I can't forget you

10: Lost Her Too

I don't remember in this story if the blossoms and coopers are related, but if not Polly and Jason at least aren't related

TONI POV:

"Tones." I look at my mom. "I don't know if I can go." I whisper looking into the mirror. She fixes my pins. "It's a wedding last time we had this talk it was before-." She stops herself. "Cheryl's funeral?" She nods. "Yeah." I look down. "This is the love of my life, who's dead's brother is getting married, I just don't know how I'm gonna be able to see Jason without Cheryl." I whisper. Mom smiles sadly and rubs my cheek. "I think you being there, will be nice though." I take a deep breath. "Yeah." I wipe my tears. "Come on. Also you should talk to Veronica."

"Can we talk?" I ask quietly. Veronica turns around. "What's up?" She ask concerned. "Yesterday, I'm sorry about that. I shouldn't have ran. I just haven't felt like this in a long ass time, I forgot how it-." She shuts my up by kissing me. "It's ok." I smile. "But I think we really need to take things slow. I'm not ready for anything still." She nods. "Of course." She smiles. "Come on." The party is pretty much over so we go upstairs. I think you can assume what we do. It's not Cheryl, nothing will ever be. I hold Veronica after our long night. I don't know if I'm ready. I don't know if I'll ever be, but I need to stop moping around. I might as well start with someone I've had feelings for since I can remember. And to answer your question, yes I did love two people at once. My love for Cheryl was more powerful though. "You ok?" Veronica breaks the silence between us. "Ahh... yeah for once." I smile. "You're still not over her, I get that but you should probably-." I stop her. "It's ok." I laugh a little. "Tonight was great, honestly. I was thinking we should do something like this more often." She smiles and nods. "Yeah, Pops tomorrow?" I nod. "Thank you for keeping me grounded." I tell Veronica. She nods. "I made a promise to do that if anything happened to her." I pull her into a kiss.

"Why are you so happy?" I walk into the kitchen. "I just had sex for the first time in 7 years. Mom." I say way to happily. "Can I ask with who?" I smile. "No." I take a deep breath. "Veronica?" I nod. "Yeah." I blush. "Finally." I look at my mom. "Yeah, I've been waiting for this for years." She smiles. "What?" I look at her confused. "Ever since Cheryl died, I honestly didn't think you'd ever find love again." She walks over to me. She doesn't look ok. "Mom you ok?" I ask quietly. "Mom." She starts to drop the floor but I catch her. "Mom."

"What happened?" The nurse ask. "I- I was talking to her and she walked over to me and and and and she she didn't look o-o-o-ok. She just dropped to the floor so so so I-I called the the ambulance." I somehow get out. "Please say she's ok. I can't go through this anymore." I beg. "I can't promise you anything." She apologizes. "Please." I whisper. "She's all I have." I cry. "How about we get you something to drink and call someone." The nurse suggest. "Can you do that?" She ask concerned. I nod. "Maybe." She smiles. "Ok. I know this is probably really hard to go through." She whispers as we walk to the cafeteria. I get some water because honestly I don't drink any else. "Do you have someone you can call?" I nod. "Ok." I call Veronica and tell her to come. "Now sit down, I'll tell you if anything happens." I sit down and wait. Veronica is still busy so she's not going to be here for a bit. It's been about 20 minutes and the nurse comes out, I stand up. "I'm sorry we couldn't save her. She had a heart attack and we couldn't get her back." I drop to the floor. "Toni." Veronica runs over to me. "I can't do this anymore. I can't do this anymore." I repeat as I start crying. "Toni what happened?" She ask quietly. "My mom." I whisper. "She's gone." I manage to get out. I cry into her. "I can't do this anymore." I whisper. She hugs me as I cry. I don't know how long I was crying because I guess I fell asleep. Now I'm home and Veronica is at the edge of my bed comforting me. "What happened?" I ask quietly. "You've been in and out for a few days." She whispers. "I need my medication that's why." I sit up. "Where is it?" She ask quietly. "In my bag." I whisper. "You haven't unpacked yet?" I shake my head. "I haven't wanted do." I roll over. "Can you turn off the light?" I ask realizing how bright it is in here. "Yeah." I sit up. "Where's mom?" I ask before taking my meds. "Toni." She rubs my cheek. "What?" She looks at me. "Oh."

"Toni talk to me." Veronica whispers rubbing my shoulder. "There's nothing to talk about." I whisper. "Except there is." She whispers to me. "Can you just let me greave?" I look at her. "Are you high?" I nod. "I told you I can't go through this again." I whisper.

"Your Mom would have loved this." Veronica whispers. "But she's not here. What does it matter?" I say slightly pissed off. "Toni." I look at her. "Breathe." She lies her hands on my chest. "Breathe." I take a deep breath. "Better?" I shake my head. "I don't want to burry her." I whisper. "Everything is going to be ok." She tells me. "Is it?"