Thoughts exposed

Dear ash

I'm sorry I made you feel miserable since you were old enough to realize your body is developing in a way to make both of us feel uncomfortable whenever we looked in the mirror or someone would mention your curves like a female body is something you should've taken pride in.

I'm sorry I kept you a secret hoping you would go away, like everyone else did back then treating you like you're just a normal teen anxiety and you wouldn't stick around more than a year or so.

I'm sorry I still have to keep you a secret from people that would hate us if they knew the truth, I'm not ready to let go of those people yet. Besides, do you really want to add to the list of words she already uses to make us want to die?

I'm sorry you have to feel uncomfortable until you're able to make this body something you can actually be yourself in.

I'm sorry your childhood memories are ones you'll never feel comfortable sharing because they're not yours, they're mine.