Writer's Block

Probably The Last | 2

It's already been 3 days after I sent the messaged to him, and he bombard me with lots of messages, and calls. But I leave them all unread, even he's voicemails, I didn't dare to listen at his explanations, nor his voice.

I swear to God, this man really knows how to be so annoying every single time.

I know I'm not in the position to act like this or even give him an attitude like this. But I don't know, I'm just really mad, sad, mix emotions. Making me more emotional than I am. I went back from my reverie when I heard a knock on my door.

It must be the pizza.

Since the past week, I didn't want to go out nor just drop by the convenient store. So I just always order delivery foods. Yeah, that's how miserable I am.

It's been already so many times that a lot of people always leave me behind, and experiencing it one more time sure tastes like hell. After my mom and dad's separation, friends betraying me, lot of shits happen. And now, the only person whom I always get to tell all my problems will also gonna leave me soon.

Oh, how happy I am gonna be for that.

But of course, plans doesn't always let you get it the way you wanted it. But planning on breaking this friendship of us will surely be successful. And ain't gonna let anyone ot anything stop nor change my decision.

I'll stick to my words this time.

There's a knock again, so I decided to get up and made my way to the door only to find him standing right there. As soon as I see his face, full of agony, I immediately closed the door. How dare he show up to me looking like that, when in fact he's the one who's leaving me and not the opposite.

So don't he dare beg to work this friendship out.

I'm so freaking tired to even face this shit right now. I just mourned to my sibling's death, just finished facing my dad's little scheme, and now this? Can't just life give me a break? Just for once, just for one day. I'm just tired by all of this stuffs and not ready to face another one.

"Heyy, don't be like this. I'll miss you." He said, sadness visible on his tone.

But I don't care, and won't give any damn care about him. If he's that sad, how could I possibly take this situation? I MEAN HE'S THE ONE WHO'S LEAVING! If he is in agony, then I'm experiencing double of it.

And don't be selfish. What will you gonna do, huh? Make me fix this friendship of us, the what? Gonna still leave sooner or later. So if you're just gonna leave in the end, why not cut the rope earlier than what you expect?

"Just give me 1-2 weeks. Please." As much as I wanted to comfort him right now, just like how he comfort me before, I can't. I freaking can't. If he needs comfort, I also need it.

We both need it. But not with each other.

"Then what? You'll still leave, right? So why make this shit longer than already it is?" I spat those words, hurting him. As if it's not hurting me triple than what he's taking.

"Just stay away, okay? Don't make this hard for me. You know how weak I am to those who's precious to me. So stop, please don't make it so hard than already it is for me." I said, covering my mouth to blocked my sobbing as I leaned my back to the door. I heard footsteps fading and that's it.

I smiled bitterly. He's finally gone.