Hopeful Thoughts

Still Praying for You

You're one of the things I struggled in surrendering to God. Asking Him to take this desire from me if it is not His Will for me, took me a long time. I felt like if it is not His Will and He'll take this little source of happiness from me, it will make my life dull.

My feelings for you were just a harmless admiration at first. Seeing you in church once or twice a month would make my Sunday extra special. Months passed by, every Sunday I hoped I would see you and on weekdays I would miss you and wished Sunday would come sooner. I don't even know if you even know me or know I even exist.

Before noticing you in church, I prayed that God would send someone in my life when I am ready. Someone that will make me closer to Him, not away from Him. I prayed that He'll mold me first to be someone that will bring that one closer to Him too. I am not that someone, yet, when you're around. And I can see that you too are struggling in submitting to God.

Your presence distracts me, gives my heart the wrong motives in serving God, and takes me away from God's purpose in my life right now. So I know, deep inside my heart, that this is wrong. Anything or anyone that takes me away from the center of God's plan for my life should not be in my priorities and should be surrendered to Him.

These feelings, I lay it down to God. If it's not from Him, He'll take this away. I won't be sad but I'll feel relieved. He'll send someone in my life, the manifestation of my prayer. I know He is in control. If it's from Him, He'll make everything work out for the best. He's molding me to be someone He wants me to be and, if it's His Will, He'd mold you to be someone that would answer my prayer.

He's maybe molding you to be someone's answer to her prayer. Don't resist it. I'm still gonna be praying for you to grow in faith and to take the call of taking the narrow path towards God's purpose for your life.