CUTE GIRL COMPLEX - Identity

Chapter 10 - Alice

Dan must have tucked me in when I had finally drifted off to sleep last night due to just how snuggly the blanket is fit and cushioned around my naked body. Although I am not sure I have been out, I know that I really needed the sleep due to just how quickly I dozed off being cradled by him. I am not entirely sure all the details that last night entailed, but I can safely presume that Dan had successfully taken my first sexual experience due to the fact that my entire body feels warm and relaxed as well as the fact that I am not wearing the pajamas I usually do when I sleep.

I let out a soft sigh as well as a little bit of a gasp as I try to sit up on the bed, realizing that Dan must've supported my sleeping body with a ton of extra cushion. However, my mind is easily taken away from those thoughts, for as I lightly stretch out to greet the glow of the mid-afternoon sun, I can both hear and feel my spine buckle and crack in at least eight different places. I roll my head back a little bit as my body is once again made to sink in relaxation.

I have lived here for almost nine years, and this is the first time, other than when Eliza's aunt and uncle had raised me as one of their own children, that I had ever had anyone stay over. In that short amount of Dan started to shelter himself here as a means to fall in love with me, my bedsheets and some of my clothing start to smell of his cologne and shampoo. The smell is not a scent I'm overly used to, but weirdly enough, there is still a pocket of that scent left in my nose from when Dan and I had sex last night.

Thinking about Dan, my cock starts to harden rather uncharacteristically. However, it isn't the same feeling as when a guy has lewd and extremely sexually fueled thoughts of someone that they find attractive. It's a feeling of pure and unadulterated sensations of love towards the man I inevitably want to spend the rest of my life with. It's a weird feeling I haven't felt before with anyone else, but the further I dig into the strings of my heart, the fuzzier I feel as I think about Dan.

Oddly, although my cock is hard and my body is quickly starting to heat up like one would if they're extremely horny, I don't notice my bulging member show through the blanket I have lying flat over my body. Instead, as it grows in heat, I feel my hips tighten quite a bit as well as buck a bit upwards. Without much thought, I let out a soft whine of questionable ecstasy as I notice that my cock is starting to get all flustered and warm just like a woman's sensual part would be; it's a completely different feeling than anything I have ever felt before in my life.

I carefully slip the sheets off of my body, and even though I expect the normal four to five inch part that drives uncomfortable dysphoria through my mind and body; I am met with only that of my completely soft and flaccid member. However, the thought that I am this hot everywhere and my cock isn't growing much in size at all deeply confuses me, so being the curious person I am, I slowly slide my hand down my body in order to touch it.

I take very good care of my body in order to further heighten the illusion that I have been a full-fledged female for my entire life despite the fact I have only been on low-concentration estrogen pills since the sixth grade. My skin is very soft, and all the way down, even if you tried, there would be no sign on peach fuzz. I am silky smooth like that of a baby, and the very fact that I am able to feel like a girl is incredibly soothing, so I start to pretend that I am one everywhere else.

My hand reaches my pelvis and thigh. Although yes, I did feel uncomfortably hard all the time throughout my life due to how the influx of estrogen had changed my libido somewhat, I haven't actually tried to feel myself down there whatsoever. Even though so much time had passed since I had originally came out as being a transgender female, just the fact that I know that my penis is there makes me feel dysphoric; almost as if I feel betrayed by my own body. If I wanted to touch it, there is no way I could force myself to.