Arthur Morgan x John Marston

Sad

felt like writing something a bit sad 

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For awhile now Arthur had been distant to John, he didn't understand why? Did Arthur find someone better? Did he not like him anymore? John sighed as questions raced through his mind, he glanced up at Arthur and saw he was leaving again. He frowned and looked down to the ground. A wave of sadness rushed over John, his thoughts were going into dark places...places he never thought he would be. 

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John's breath hitched as he looked down the side of the cliff he was on. Was he really going to do this?  John thought about Arthur again and his eyes welled with tears. All the good times and happy days, all for nothing? Maybe John was a fool to think that Arthur would love someone like him. There were no men like him, maybe thats why Arthur lost interest or-or found someone better...?

John placed his hands against the sides of his head and sobbed. He can't stop the voices in his head from questioning. What happened to him and Arthur? Was John really that bad of a person? 

John fell to his knees, his legs failing him. He couldn't process what his mind was making him do, his thoughts controlled his actions. Again he asked himself

 Am I really going to do this?

He felt an emptiness settle inside him, maybe he should. Maybe everyone would be better off without him. Suddenly John stood again, taking slow steps towards the edge, before his eyes blurred and he couldn't make out what was going on, He felt arms wrap around his waist in a tight squeeze.

"John! What the hell are you doing!?" 

he heard a familiar voice. He furrowed his brows. 

"A-Arthur?" 

His voice cracked, sounding weak and fragile. That's what he was after all...

"John..." Arthur whispered, turning the man around in his arms, before John passed out from all the exhausting thoughts.

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John woke finding he was inside a tent. Not his. He recognized it though, it was Arthur's. He looked around and found that Arthur had slept on the floor beside him, still asleep. John frowned and reached down to him, gently caressing his face before standing up and leaving. 

Why did Arthur save him? Didn't he not love him anymore? John sighed again and sat on a log, not long after a voice startled him. 

"Where's John!??" 

Arthur looked around before noticing him and letting out a breath. "John.." He whispered, walking up to him. John didn't look at him, he just stared at his hands. "John, I have so many questions but I need to apologize first....I'm sorry for being distant, Dutch has been hard on me lately and I'm not sure why, maybe it's because I deserve it or because he's lazy and can't do shit for himself," Arthur said, John cracking a small smile. "I love you John, please, tell me why you were on that cliff," Arthur finished. 

John frowned again. Why was he on that cliff? "It was because of you...I thought maybe you found someone better or maybe I just wasn't good enough-" John stopped when Arthur grabbed his hand. "I don't want anyone else John, And you're more than good enough, I'm not good at explaining my feelings but, you make me feel like I'm the only person on this world, and that feeling is incredible, I can't explain it well but I want you to know I love you so goddamn much," Arthur explained, his eyes locked on John's teary ones. John suddenly smiled, he couldn't stay mad at him. 

"I love you too Arthur, I'm sorry I tried to-...to-" John stopped mid-sentence and Arthur frowned, "You don't have to think like that again alright? I should tell when something's bothering me" Arthur said, pulling John into his lap and leaning his head against his back. John smiled again and placed his arms over Arthur's. "I love you pretty boah" Arthur said. 

"I love you too Arthy"

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I hope you enjoyed, I might've gotten a bit carried away? maybe? idk anyways, thank you for reading, please comment and vote for more! <3