Mystery Account

7.5-I'm Scared

[This is actual book form! :D All the .5s will, ok?]

The tears poured off Draco's face like a raging, broken dam. His emotions were jumbled and had just been manhandled by Harry fucking Potter, like he actually cared. Too bad when—no, if—he found out, he would scrunch his nose up in disgust and turn away, and pretend nothing ever happened. But why did he act like if he figured it out, he'd be okay with it?

Pansy had been messaging him on the mystery account he oh-so-famously owned, and now he really regretted talking her into getting a phone, even if it was an Android.

Draco shut off his phone, threw it on the bed, and tugged at his hair anxiously, his hands clenching a ball of it. He didn't know how he dug himself such a deep hole, it seemed impossible. It'd only been a week.

Blaise was angry, Pansy was trying, Potter was clueless, and Draco was now pinning worse. His heart quenched and ached as his flushed face scrunched up and he hid himself in a ball. Pansy wasn't banging on the door anymore, but she was blowing up his phone that went 'DING DING DING' and messed with his head a bit more than he was comfortable with.

And that was when he threw the phone.

He couldn't handle it. The phone landed next to the potions book he had been reading and threw earlier in frustration.

Draco's wide and blurred, shattered and tearing, eyes stared at the phone as two more notifications came. His heart felt like it was going to burst, and he was just laughing with Potter a few minutes ago.

Blinking rapidly, he shook the thought of the Boy Who Lived and got up, staggering. He had to get rid of Pansy, but he had to talk to her though, too. Merlin, he wanted to just curl up in a ball and cry, just have a good cry, let it all out, but he also had reassure Pansy.

With that, he picked up the phone and managed to walk over to the door, his hand shaking as it was laid itself on the doorknob. He took such a rugged breath to try to calm his nerves, which only did the opposite, as he felt his heart hammer to close up his chest. He unlocked the phone as he opened the door, and there Pansy stood, furiously tuping on her Android phone.

Her eyes took a moment before looking up at him and they almost popped out of her head. She looked back down at the phone and typed something before glancing back up at him.

Draco glanced on the phone and almost laughed at what he saw. It read, "oh hello there" from thepanpansy. He honestly would have laughed if he wasn't crying and shaking. He forced himself to look back up at the pansexual Pansy.

She looked almost in tears for him. He probably looked horrible, and that's why. This Slytherin, the great and powerful Draco Malfoy, a Malfoy, crying alone in his room, because all his bottled up emotions had finally gotten to him, and Potter seemed like he cared for him genuinely. No one had talked to him like that before, and his trained-to-be-cold heart had melted, it was dripping, leaking from his eyes.

Pansy's first thought about the situation was to hug him, engulf him in the warmth he needed. It was always rather cold in the Malfoy Manor, in the dorms, even under a blanket there, but what reminded them that Slytherins still have hearts is that Pansy radiated warmth, and Draco just wanted to melt all over again.

She led Draco to the bed and continue to hug him. He just cried. He cried and cried, and even began to sob and hiccup as it just got worse and worse, him shaking in her firm grip. She didn't even ask any questions, she just was there, and that was enough.

That's what friends are for, Draco thought, as he pulled back a little bit, unclenching his hand from the back of her robes.

Pansy looked at him, her eyes now dry, but still full of concern. "Are you okay now? I... I still want to talk about you and Blaise," she was saying, but Draco blanched and shook his head, Pansy taking it as her taking a wrong move.

"Oh, we, we don't have to- I just- He wanted to-" She took a breath and calmed herself—Draco was jealous—and began again. "He's only looking out for you. Draco, he just doesn't want you to be heartbroken over... whoever it is."

That was right, she didn't know.

Draco shifted uneasily and eyes glued to her lap, he muttered, "Harry Potter." The words sounded so broken, so heartbroken, because he knew he'd never get a chance with the boy. George Weasley was right, he was irresistible, and I was right, everyone likes Harry fucking Potter. There was just no how in not. I got closer to him, and I wanted to see him turn homophobic or into some stuck up, fame-obsessed guy, but he wasn't, he was the opposite. He was perfect. He was so fucking perfect.

"I get how you feel, Draco, I do..."

Draco blinked. His blurred vision didn't stop him from seeing the look she gave him. Full on pity it showed, and his hands balled into fists, cursing himself as he realised what he did. He'd said his little rant aloud. God fucking damn it.

"How would you even know how I feel?" he stuttered through, brows knit tightly together as he resented his broken voice.

"Well..." Pansy looked to the side, a smile tugging on her lips. "Hermione Granger isn't as bad of a bookworm know-it-all as we thought." With that sentence, she let it sink in. After a second, she added, "Plus, I really want to fucking braid her bigass hair, but it'd be weird to see me casually braiding it."

Somehow, this made Draco laugh. Imagining that bushy-haired mudblood with two French braids going down her shoulders... iconic, really. She'd probably even look adorable for a mudblood.

Draco looked down and swallowed thickly. "Blaise warned me I'd get attached to him if I kept my silly crush on him, and he was right. It hurts, Pansy." His voice cracked as another tear went down his face and Pansy shook her head, tsking, and hugging him again. He gratefully took the hug, his arms wrapping around her torso immediately and squeezed.

"It's okay. We all get that from time-to-time, we're all still human and our hearts are big fuckwads that like people we'll never ever fucking be able to have a chance with, but that's just life."

Her reassurance was both understanding and aggressive. He saw how both of them had the same problem, what a small world. He now realised that look of pity was actually a look saying 'boy, me fucking too.'

They pulled back and Pansy gave a soft smile. It wasn't normal for her to be so sweet, but even tough bullies like them needed to cheer each other up and show kindness. For a change, they actually found a problem in common.

There was silence before Pansy broke into a awkward, flustered laugh. "I'm scared- honestly... I'm trying figure out how to ask her out, do you have any tips?"

"Don't fuck it up."

[i still personally believe this is complete and utter crap, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
ooh, look at the smile シ シ シ ㋛ シ シ ت  hehe pretty ༼ つ ◕◡◕ ༽つ (☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞ (<--this one looks high) ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ (ง'̀-'́)ง  <--AHAHAHA THIS ONE-]