losing you (tomtord)

i love you

tord sat on a beanbag in tom's room. tom was sitting on the bed. he was on his phone, laughing every few minutes. when tom would laugh, tord would smile to himself. tom was too amazing for his own good. tord looked over at tom. he had his face in his phone, watching a video or something, he didn't really know. all he knew, was that tom was adorable. 

they had been friends for quite some time, and tord eventually grew feelings for him. tord was tapping away on his phone, talking to a close buddy, edd. edd was tord's first friend back at the beginning of high school when he moved to england. 

tord: edd idk what to do, he's adorable. 

edd: bro just like- ask him out or smthn, im sure he'd say yes.

tord: no, he'd think im weird. 

edd: ok then, shut up.

tord: alright.

tord laughed quietly. he knew edd wasn't serious. edd loved to play cupid. in fact, he had gotten multiple people at school to go out with each other. when tord asked about it, edd would always say 'i like to feel powerful' and would continue his matchmaking. 

"tord? you okay?" tord broke out of his thoughts, and looked at tom. "you zoned out on me for a minute, i was talking to you." tom smiled. tord always had a habit of zoning out into his thoughts. 

"im sorry, continue. or uh, restart. whichever is best for you." tord put one hand over his pinking face in embarrassment. 

"it's okay, i was just telling you about this girl that i met. she goes to school with us, her name is sam." tord knew sam, she was in his biology class, along with another class. tom was in that class. she was a blonde girl, that always wore her hair in a high ponytail. she was mostly quiet and payed attention to the teacher, not like tord at all. tord would always mess around. he hated sitting in one spot for an hour, just for the bell to ring, and for him to do it all over again.

"sam is super cool, i found out. we've been talking to each other for a little bit." tom smiled, glancing at his phone. he typed something quickly, and turned back to tord. tord smiled. 

"she sounds like an interesting character. how'd you start talking to her?" 

"well, she was in class, reading a book, which so happens to be my favorite book, so i started a conversation with her about it. we exchanged numbers when the bell rang, and now here we are! she's super fun to talk to, and she's got an opinion about everything. she's so smart!" tord's smile faltered.

it sounds like sam is a super fun lady! tord looked at the time. 9:25. 

"hey, i've got to go, it's late. i'll see you tomorrow at school. are we going to walk together again?" tom nodded. tord grabbed his black bag, and slung it over his shoulder. he went and stood by the door, about to say goodbye.  

"i'll walk you out." tord smiled and nodded. tom walked up, and held open the door for tord. he nodded a thanks. they went to the door, tom opening it for tord, and waving. "goodbye! thanks for coming over, come over literally any time im almost always available." tom said, smiling. he was also waving wildly, like a dork. tord snorted, and waved back, just as enthusiastically. 

"bye tom, i'll see you at school tomorrow." tord started walking home, a slight smile on his face. he never really thought he was gay, he hadn't ever liked any boys before tom. what sexuality even is that? is it bisexual? pansexual? gay? tord didn't want to get into that. he's tomsexual. attracted to tom. that's it. tord took out his earbuds, and started untangling them. once they were free, he connected them to his phone, and started his music. 

tord woke up the next day, by his older brother, pat, shaking him. he blearily opened his eyes, and looked confusingly up at his brother.

"you slept through your alarm, you're gonna be late." he said calmly. tord threw the covers off of him, and pulled off his t-shirt, replacing it with a clean one. he slept in his jeans, so he just put his socks on, slid on his shoes, grabbed his backpack (and his phone) and was out the door in a matter of minutes. he wasn't running to school, but he wasn't walking either. speed walking. he glanced at his phone every few seconds. tom was going to leave without him, wasn't he?

tord ran head on into somebody. he stumbled back, mumbling apologies. he had a habit of saying sorry too many times. 

"sorry, oh my gosh, sorry i wasn't looking where i was going, sorry." tord looked up, and saw tom, smiling at him. "tom! i'm sorry, i didn't mean to run into you, sorry." he said that sentence very fast. 

"hey! i'm fine, and you're fine, there's nothing to be sorry for. it wasn't your fault, you're fine." tord pushed his hair out of his face, sighing. 

"sorry that i kept you waiting, i slept through my alarm, and pat had to wake me up last second." tom looked at him, raising an eyebrow. tord rolled his eyes. "i forgot, don't yell at me."

"tord. look at me." tord looked at him dully.

"do not say sorry-" "unless it's your fault" tord finished the sentence.

"it was my fault though, i made us late." tord said, as he started walking. tom followed, right by his side. tom looked at his watch, and showed it to tord. '7:48' 

"we aren't late yet, so don't worry about it." tom shoved tord lightly. "you worry too much." tord sighed, he sure did worry too much. tord looked at the ground as they walked, counting the number of steps he took per square of the sidewalk. it was a habit that kept him distracted. tom was rambling on about something, but tord was only half listening. he wanted to be listening, but he just lost focus a lot. 

"so, the anime, edd showed it to me. you know? that one that you like a lot. i forgot what it's called though. it cool, i didn't expect to like it, im not much of an anime person. my favorite character is-" tom looked at tord. he was staring down at the ground, a faraway look in his eyes. he gently shook tord's shoulder, and he jumped. tord groaned, rubbing his head.

"i'm s-" tom shot him a glare "i zoned out again. i could kind of hear you, you were talking about an anime, right?" tom nodded. 

"don't worry, you're fine. i know how much you hate zoning out, but it's okay, you didn't miss much." tord was about to say something, but he caught sight of the school ahead of them.

"oh, we're here. what class do you have first? you've told me before but i can't remember what it was."

"it's math, which is dumb because i hate math." the bell rang loudly. tom waved to tord, and walked in the opposite direction.