Let It All Out

Bonjour, my friends. So this is my first Harry Potter fanfiction. I'm sorry for any mistakes and OOC-ness. But I just wondered how he met Astoria and he says in the Cursed Child that she changed him and I kinda wanted to write how. Drastoria is seriously underrated compared to Dramione and Drarry so we need some love for this amazing ship here. 

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WARNING: Strong language and a lot of hurt.

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to the Queen herself, the Prophetess-JKR.

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He couldn't stay. He needed to get away.

The Dark Lord was dead. They had won, though he wasn't sure if "they" included him. He was alive. His parents were too. They had all lived. He should've been happy for being able to stay alive. Or he should've been mourning the end of the Dark Lord. But this, this was hollowness. He couldn't feel. He was afraid of what outburst would escape him if he tried to feel. And he was a Slytherin, and a Malfoy- they don't show their feelings. That was for lesser men.

He couldn't bear it. All those people crying or talking with their family. People rejoicing the death of the greatest Dark Wizard. His parents had left after the original mayhem. They had been overjoyed that he was alive and they were all together again. He wished he felt the same feeling. He knew it would only be days before the Ministry came knocking and probably carted him and his father, maybe even his mother, to Azkaban. But that was not what was eating him up.

He couldn't bear it anymore.

He walked down the halls of that place that he used to call home. He had hated it at first. He thought himself better than it. That was until the Carrows had spoilt the one place that he realized with a jolt, where he had actually been happy. He entered the Slytherin Common Room. There were damages all over the castle but somehow, this place had escaped unscathed. Sighing, he slumped down on one of the chairs and stared into space. One thought pounded in his head:

No one understands.

And that was the problem. No one understands what he, Draco Malfoy, had gone through. To the Slytherins, he had been their Prince. To the others- the Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws, he was the epitome of the Dark Side at Hogwarts. He was the bully who picked on people. He was the guy who had caused all of this.

Nothing would ever be the same.

Draco was tired, so very tired- of keeping up the façade that all of this didn't bother him; that he didn't give a shit about all the other non-Slytherins; that he was still faithful to the Dark Lord. He couldn't stand looking at himself in the mirror. He was a monster. He was vile, evil, a coward and repulsive, even to himself. He was even worse than Wormtail. He deserved Azkaban. He deserved much worse for all the suffering he had brought.

He was stuck in a stupor when he heard the click of the Common Room door being opened and in entered a girl. He blinked once, just to make sure lack of food and sleep hadn't made him start hallucinating. She was real, all right. He groaned to himself. He couldn't handle anybody right now, and definitely not some annoying junior. He looked closely at her for a second. Ah, the little Greengrass. Daphne's sister.

He scrutinized her for another second. She was OK-looking, he supposed. Could be classified pretty, if she dressed up and all, but right now-she only wore a T-shirt and jeans. Long blonde hair in waves which, right now, was covered with soot and dust. She had blue eyes that stood out from her pale complexion. She had an OK figure but he had been with way more gorgeous and voluptuous women before. She didn't bother him. "What was her name again?" he thought. Something with the letter A.