Silver Currents of Change

Chapter 33

In late January of 2008, Zarah returned home to Malibu after enjoying a four-day weekend in New York where she worked with Ash on the book. She had taken on more of the research, interviewing and writing, and he insisted she take co-author credit and half of his advance. That meant the stakes were higher for her now, and she busier, more invested in the book project than she originally planned to be. Harvey was in Mississippi on business, and although she'd just stepped into the house, his girlfriend was already missing him like crazy. The beautiful and cozy home on the beach they shared felt big and incredibly empty whenever he was gone. She unpacked, showered, and pulled on a pair of blue jean shorts and one of her man's white cotton dress shirts. She needed to feel close to him.

Trying not to feel or to act "nouveau riche," she still needed to reconnect to believe her new life. Rolling up the shirt's sleeves, she decided to take a walk through the incredible home they shared. She pinched both arms to make sure she wasn't dreaming. It was still hard to believe. She'd gone from being a poor little Mississippi country girl with nothing but hopes and dreams, to living a life of ultimate luxury. A life that felt like a dream. Strolling through room after room, everything was as beautiful as she remembered it. Exquisite light pine hardwood floors stretched endlessly throughout the house. A living room with walls of glass overlooking the ocean greeted her with peaceful illumination. Through the living room, she stood watching peaceful waves as they reached and caressed their own private beach. Surrounded by light, she turned toward the room to admire furniture they shopped for together. It made her feel like they were already married when they bought the antique white linen sofa to be the centerpiece of the living area. They spent a lot of time there. She closed her eyes, hugged herself, and felt his arms around her. Days and nights making love or just being in love. Sometimes they pretended to fight over the remote control when they knew they wouldn't be watching much TV. Through the formal dining room of the open floor plan, she entered the enormous eat-in gourmet chef's kitchen. They both loved to cook, so Harvey made sure they had a dream kitchen with plenty of work space, all outfitted in authentic Brazilian tropical brown granite counter tops. It had stainless steel appliances and anything and everything either of them could ever want or need to prepare their favorite meals. Whenever she cooked for him, her goal was to bring him joy; to be the source of the light in his eyes and the smiles on his face. And, while she knew it wasn't always possible, she only wanted to bring happiness to him, to make him feel all the happiness he had given her.

The nurturing flow of their home reminded her how she and her man were going with the flow, allowing their days together to create a view for them of a future where they were a stronger, happier version of themselves. Once she got to rooms that didn't open up to the beach, the variety of the estate presented views of a scenic, white brick courtyard high above Pacific Coast Highway, with breathtaking canyon views. The grounds were elegantly landscaped with plenty of green grass and shrubs, hibiscus, bougainvillea, and a lovely and colorful rose garden. It was splendid oceanfront living at its best. But how could it all be real? Was she going to wake up one day to find it was just a beautiful painting, simulating reality? 

When she got to the deck, she remembered the day he purchased the home, nearly two months earlier. After their Hawaii vacation, they were excited about living on the beach together, so they went shopping and bought four big, white, wooden Adirondack chairs and a table to match for the deck. They wanted something that looked durable and comfortable, something they could grow old together sitting on. Wanting everything they needed for fun on the beach, they bought, all in the same day, two boogie boards, two jet skis, and plush beach towels in every color they could find. Harvey wanted to help her get used to not being limited by lack. He said she needed to understand both the power and the joy of having wealth, and he wanted to help her "transcend" the mindset she had from growing up in a home with financial challenges. He knew she would always be frugal and responsible with money, but, he said, because she was his woman, she had to get beyond feeling like she was still a poor college student.