Hi, Coffee Guy (W., #2)

08 - Closing my journal

To you, W,

It's been a roller coaster of emotions for you this past year. I have always wondered if you can handle those unfamiliar emotions all at once but I'm glad you did.

You fell in love.

You got hurt.

You questioned yourself and your worth.

You struggled to accept the truth.

You tried to move on.

You got scared of falling again.

You built higher walls.

And finally, you moved forward.

I know it was hard. It was painful. It was a long and arduous process. But at the end of the day, everything was worth it. Because you did it for yourself. For your peace.

And now, look at you. You can finally smile because you're happy, not because you have to.

Falling in love and getting hurt in the process was not your fault. It was not something you asked for. It just happened. But accepting that you got hurt yet not letting the pain define you was the right thing to do.

But you became too conscious and scared of feeling those emotions again. You were always on guard from people who could break the walls you surrounded yourself with.

But I also think that's alright. It's okay to be cautious to prevent getting hurt again. It's okay to protect yourself, as long as you don't completely close off your heart.

I know, he reminds you of the love you've lost before. He also knows what you went through. He knows how hard it is to move on. He knows what he feels for you. But maybe, being each other's company and support is enough for now.

You're still healing.

You're still learning to love yourself a little more.

Maybe you just need to enjoy what you have this moment and where you are right now. After all, you look happy and contented with the way things are this time.

You should not worry about the past anymore and get anxious about the future. You just have to enjoy the present. You just have to live in the moment. After all, this is where you should be. Right here. Not in the memories and pain of the past, nor in the uncertainties of the future.

And maybe, at the right time, when you're both ready to face each other's feelings, you can love with all your heart again and receive the love you deserve.

And when that time comes, I hope you read this journal again and look back on the times that brought you there. To remind you of what you went through and how it all started. To remind you that it's alright to get hurt and grieve for a while, as long as you don't stay in that state. That it's okay to feel and fall again.

Lastly, I wish you nothing but happiness. The kind that warms your heart and brings you peace of mind. The kind that makes you contented with everything you have.

Because at the end of the day, that kind of happiness is all that matters.

Finally closing this journal,

Wilhelmina

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