Journal # ...

Locks

You crashed

And you scared me

You lied

And you are supposed to love me

My hair was dark.

You went to fucking sleep

And you told me you love me

You came to fucking thanksgiving

And you never see me

My hair was short.

We were supposed to be finding ourselves

And we were supposed to just be fucking

We were something to keep you occupied

And we are holding onto the past

My hair was light.

You say you're just using her for her car

And you say nobody rides you like me

You don't even talk to me anymore

And you told me i "keep getting dumber"

My hair is purple.

You didn't use a condom

And you said i was "daddy's little sex slave"

You didn't even fit it was so small

And you think i'm a whore

My hair is mine.

Your little sad boy eyes keep finding me

And your dairy-free ice cream i crave

Your sweatshirt keeps me warm

And your voice no longer calms me

My hair is wild.

We were so happy

And we were so intimate

We were never anything

And we are drifting apart

My hair was long.

I miss you

And i love you

I don't think about you

And i don't know you

My hair is red.

You drove me to the abc store in your new girl's car

Four months after you crashed the car and didn't care enough to check on me

And then you went to fucking sleep while i went to the hospital

But i still forgave you and we agreed to work on ourselves

But you met someone new

And you're using her for her car

And you keep looking at me with your sad boy eyes

And i miss you.

Colton.

I went back to your house to spend your last night here with you

A week after I'd cried after our round

You'd fucked me so hard I couldn't take it

And you'd said i was "daddy's sex slave"

But i let you do it

Because before we'd made love

And you cried to me as i cried to you

And you told me nobody rides you like me

And we were so intimate

And I love you.

Abe.

I haven't seen you in months

You stopped talking to me after I confessed my love

You made me sound crazy

Like we never were anything

You came to fucking thanksgiving

But you never cared about me

And I stopped caring too

And i kept your sweatshirt

And i don't think about you.

Ken-doll

I spoke to you last night

And you told me each day I'm "getting dumber"

But you're supposed to be my best friend

My shoulder

But we are holding onto the past

And we are drifting apart

And your voice no longer calms me

And you think i'm a whore

And i don't know you.

Jaylen