At the End of the World

Going Through the Motions

"Ethan...we can't...we shouldn't do this.  I've told you, I don't want to mess up anything.  I promised I wouldn't interfere."

"You aren't doing any of that.  And besides, I should have done this a long time ago, and I'm not going to give up now."

"...sigh...I don't know if I can do this.  This is moving so fast."

"Then we won't do anything you don't want to do - I promise.  But I won't leave you alone, Lenne.  I want to be with you like this."

"I want to be with you, too, Ethan.  I always have...and I always will."

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The morning has returned once more.

He didn't even get up and look at the alarm anymore.  He was always up at seven on the dot.  He moved out of bed quickly and quietly, as not to disturb the lady who slept beside him.  But she always seemed to know when he wake up - her eyes fluttered open soon after, and a content sigh escaped from her lips.

Bree, his life, his love, his long-suffering girlfriend arose to greet her beloved, a tired smile spread across her lips.

"Good morning, baby," she slurred in her sultry whisper.  "Did you sleep well?"

"I guess so."  Sometimes, he said nothing at all.  He could never tell her that he hadn't slept well in seven years or that his dreams consisted of finding the woman who had his heart.  "I'm getting ready for work now."

She'd tempt him with promises to make it worth his while if he stayed in bed, but he'd refuse more often than accept.  And when he did accept it was out of duty rather than choice.  Once upon a time, it wasn't always this way - at least that's the way he remembered.

He went through his motions.  He showered, put on this worth clothes, drank a cup of coffee, and headed out the door.  She barely gets a smile and a kiss, yet she takes it all the same.  They both know that his a man without a heart - and they both know why.  But they make it work somehow. 

Even if he dreamed of another woman every night, he awakened to Bree every morning.  For them, that was more than enough.

"Have a good day at work, Ethan," Bree chirped on his way out the door.  "Are you coming straight home tonight?"

He held his breath.  "No, I, um, I might be a little late."

Bree sighed, unable to hide her displeasure.  "You aren't planning to go there again are you?"  He remained silent - they already know.  She flicks back her blonde hair, placing a hand on her hips.  "Really, again, Ethan?  Don't you think it's time you outgrew this habit of yours?"

"I promise I won't be long.  Besides, we have that concert later on."  The frown on her face deepened.  "You promised you'd go with me, remember?"

"Yeah, I know a promised, but I still don't think we should go."  Even as he scooped her into his arms for a hug, he could feel her annoyance - just as he knew she felt the distance between them.  "Besides, it's been seven years - don't you think it's time about time to let go of this mess."

He sighs, kissing her on the forehead.  "I'll call you at lunch, all right?  See you later."

He left the apartment without another word, into another cold, dreary, and listless day.  It could have warm with the sun shining all over the lands, but for him, the days were always a little colder and he always viewed the world in gray shades.  It didn't make him any less efficient - but it never made life anymore enjoyable.

But it was supposed to be.  After years of hard work and effort, he was finally in line to inherit the family landscaping business as he'd proved himself to be not only an adapt businessman but also a man who knew he way around a front yard.  His father wasted no time in grooming him, assured that his only son would continue on with his work, that the business would continue to endure long enough for Ethan himself to pass down the business to the next generation - future son or future daughter.  The go-to name in town, they business was very lucrative and very busy and would be if they continued to play their cards right.