Watching over you ✔ (Lucifer fanfiction/Deckerstar)

Thirty-eight years since Lucifer went back to Hell

Please mind the trigger warning in the story description.

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It took Lucifer eleven years until he decided that it was time to go back to Earth. He had spent the past years finding reasons not to go, from the conviction that he didn't belong there, now less than ever, to the memories of how much he had struggled to get back to normal after his last visit. But he eventually ran out of reasons that didn't come down to one emotion: Helplessness.

As much as he'd tried to push it aside, it wouldn't go away and it didn't want to be ignored any longer.

What if the Detective was sick, or just old and feeble? She certainly couldn't be as fit and healthy as she had used to be. Nobody could run from age and death. Not even him. He was as powerless as any human when it came to mortality, even if it didn't threaten his own life. It was enough that it threatened the one person he loved.

He had saved her life so many times, thrown himself in front of bullets and made himself the target to distract villains from her. He had even healed her from her gunshot wound back when he hadn't really known her, but his celestial powers couldn't compete against the natural end of human lifespan. There was nothing he could do to stop death, and he dreaded to watch his Detective suffer without the ability to change anything about it.

But the only thing worse than these thoughts was the idea of never seeing her again. Maybe it would be wiser to keep the image of her at the beach, happy and surrounded by family, as his last memory of her, but he refused to accept that that day had been the end of their story.

So since he'd realized that he could either stay in Hell and feel helpless or go to Earth and probably feel just as helpless, but at least be close to the Detective, and face his anxiety head on like he had learned from Linda, he was gathering courage, and today was the day. He'd go up. He pushed Azrael's silver feather in between his white ones and, casting one last look around over his doomed kingdom from the top of his throne, steadied himself and took flight.

The roof he landed on was slightly familiar. It was high up, overlooking the busy city below, yet far away from its daily bustle. The altitude drowned the sounds of cars and sirens from the streets. It was the perfect place to hide from other people and be alone. Yes, that was the reason this particular roof felt familiar. This was the place to which he had flown the Detective to safety during their fight with Cain. What did that mean?

Lucifer looked around, his heart rate picking up and only slowing down a little after he spotted her. She was sitting on a rectangular ventilation shaft that had the perfect height to be used as a bench, her eyes closed. She would have looked peaceful if she hadn't been hugging herself in a way that suggested she was trying to hold herself together and find comfort.

Lucifer carefully approached her from the side. He set one foot in front of the other in silence, forgetting for the moment that she could neither see nor hear him. He walked around her while keeping up some distance until he finally squatted down two yards in front of her. Now his face was level with hers. He was mesmerized by her presence and her quiet, unable to take his eyes off her.

Finally, she opened her eyes and looked up. For a moment, Lucifer felt as if she was looking straight at him, and he shivered. He had forgotten what it felt like to have her looking at him, to have someone looking at him with anything other than fear or disgust. But then her eyes wandered upwards to the sky, and he was reminded that he was still invisible to her. He followed her gaze to see what she was looking at, but it didn't seem to be anything specific. All that could be seen was the clear blue sky above them, with a few clouds here and there. He wondered what they were looking at when he heard her sigh.