Chasing Love - Colby brock x reader Sam Golbach x Reader

Chapter 27

I woke up to the sound of a heart monitor, and a low mumbling of someone talking nearby. I felt someone holding my hand and I opened my eyes squinting from the bright lights. I looked over and seen Sam holding my hand with his forehead resting on it gently, "you look rough" my voice was raspy and my throat was dry. He looked up and gasped "you're awake" he kissed me and I noticed his eyes were red and puffy. "I gotta go tell the nurse you're ok" he stood up and sighed like he was trying not to cry.

I looked over and seen Colby asleep in the chair by the window, I grabbed a pen from the tray next to the bed and tossed it at him. He opened his eye confused and looked at me "hey..... oh shit hey you're awake" he stood up and hugged me gently. "Yeah I'm just a little sore...other than that I feel great" when I said I feel great he frowned and bit his lip looking away. The nurse and the dr walked in followed by Sam they all looked grim, "so what's going on doc how are my babies" the doctor sat in the chair Sam was sitting in when I woke up and sighed.

"Miss Y/l/n I'm sad to say they didn't make it we did an emergency cecarian to remove the fetuses because they didn't survive the accident" his words broke my heart worse than anything in my life. I looked at my stomach that was no longer rounded from them, I started to tremble and tears poured from my eyes. "They... They" I couldn't speak, I could barely breathe. I felt like my entire life had abruptly stopped at that moment, "I'm sorry Miss Y/l/n"

~~~

I don't remember what happened but now I'm sitting on my couch with an ice pack on my stomach and Sam bringing my my antibiotics. "Hey are you ok... you haven't said a word for 2 weeks" he placed his hand on mine and I shrugged. I took my antibiotics and slumped over laying on my side curling my knees up slightly. I hadn't left the couch since I got home, Sam, Colby, and Liz took turns staying with me.

"Y/n you need to eat" I heard Colby say from beside me. I groaned in response letting him know I wasn't going to, I had moved only a few time since yesterday when Sam was here but that was only to go pee. "I have to pee" those were the first words I had spoke since I left the hospital. "What? Yeah.. ok need help up?" He stood up still surprised I spoke and began to help me up.

I hate going to the bathroom, because I had to walk passed the room. I stood up and slowly made my way to the bathroom, Colby had his hand on my lower back as we walked. I paused looking at the circus themed room, I seen a little girl playing with dolls as he brother tried to run them over with his monster trucks and I started to cry. I reached out and slammed the door loudly, I could hear Colby take a shakey breath behind me. He wrapped his arms round me as I cried, I turned to face him and hugged him back. I cried from sorrow and pain, the more I cried the more my body trembled and the more pain plagued my body.

I gather myself and pushed Colby away gently  before turning back around to face the door, "I pick their names that day..." I put my hand on the door and frowned. "Cole and Samantha after their fathers, who changed my life." I slowly walked to the bathroom and shut the door. When I came out Colby was still standing there looking at the wooden sign that said welcome to the circus.

~~~

It had been about a month since the accident, time passed so fast it was just a blur. Like someone was fast forwarding my life, everything was how are you... are you ok... I'm so sorry..... you look better... and it'll get easier. And I lied I said I was fine and everything was ok, but in reality I was  dead inside. I was sitting on the couch staring at the sun shining onto the black curtains just barely showing through. My boss put in my maternity leave so I had the three months off, I planned on staying home but everyone I knew was hell bent on getting me out to do something.

I stood from the couch and walked to the bathroom, I glanced in the mirror raising my shirt to look at my stomach. I had stretch marks that were barely visible, I ran my fingers over the pale pink lines on my belly and sighed. I felt empty and depressed since I lost my babies, I hadn't went in their room let alone opened their door since that day.

"You know.... you can be with your babies" I looked back at the mirror and seen my reflection smiling at me. "What do you mean?" I asked the mirror confused, "don't play dumb you know what I mean" my mirror self  said in a snarky tone. Her eyes darted from the drawer next to me then back to me the realization set in. "No that's not an option" I tried to reason with my myself and I shook my head. "Well you can always use those" my mirror self looked to the pills on the counter and smiled again.

I turned on the water and splashed my face when I looked back at the mirror my other reflection was gone and it was back to me. I grabbed the pill and dumped then on the counter, "it wont hurt if that's what you're afraid of" I looked up seeing my reflection smiling at me again. I frowned and looked at the pill "or maybe you deserve the pain, it is your fault that they're gone"

"No my light was green"

"But you didn't look both ways"

"They didn't stop..... it's not my fault"

"If you were paying attention you woulda seen them"

"It's my fault...."

"That's right you could of avoided all of this.... do it and be with your babies"

"I can be with my babies"

I looked at the pills and began taking them one by one until there were none left on the counter. "See that wasn't so hard. Now write some melodramatic note about being in a better place" I looked at myself in the mirror as my darkness took control.

Liz POV

I had called Y/n like six times, but she wasn't answering so I decided to go to her apartment. I let myself in knowing that she wouldn't get off the couch to answer the door, when i walked in i heard the bathroom sink running so i figured she would be out in a second.  "Y/n! I called but you didn't answer. Wanna go to Chipotle?" I yelled so she could hear me. I set my keys and phone on the counter before walking to the bathroom door. I tapped the door with my pointer finger knuckle and called out again. "Hey dude"

No response..... "yo you ok..... I'm coming in" I opened the door seeing her on the ground by the toilet. I seen the empty bottle of pain killers by the sink "fuck are you serious." I dialed 911 and dropped to my knees rolling her on her side. She was still breathing and starting to convulse, the dispatcher said they were sending an ambulance and to preform CPR if she stopped breathing. I was freaking out.

"Dammit Y/n dont you leave me here alone. How am I supposed to deal with Sam and Colby without you?!" I started screaming at her hoping for a miracle. I heard sirens and I ran to the door, opening it, then returning to Y/n's side. Tears ran down my face as I stared down at my best friend "I cant lose you too..." I heard footsteps running towards us and I was pulled away from her lifeless body.

"Time of death?" I heard one ask and I snapped. I flipped her on her back and brought both of my fist down on her chest multiple times. I was pulled away again and the EMT pressed his fingers to her neck. "We have a pulse... its weak. We need to get her to the truck and stabilize her. Miss do you know what she took?" I nodded and handed them the bottle and I choked down a sob. "Yeah Oxycodone" they took the bottle from me and began taking her out of the bathroom.

~~~

I sat in the waiting room repeatedly wiping my palms on my pants. Sam and Colby were both on their way here I called them from the ambulance when we were on our way. They weren't letting Y/n have visitors until they could confirm her condition was stable.

I heard Sam call my name and I stood up running to him, I wrapped my arms around him sobbing. "Hey hey its ok" he rubbed my back trying to calm me down. I felt another hand on my back and turned around to hug Colby, "when can we see her?" He asked. "When they know for sure she is stable...." I said wiping my face.

Y/n's doctor came out and looked at me grudgingly, "Is there anyone named Colby out here?"  Colby out his hand up and stepped forward "She is conscious and can have one visitor. She keeps asking for you. So if you'll follow me I'll take you to her room." Colby nodded and looked at Sam with a sad expression before following the doctor.