Letting Go

Chapter 1

Engaged. After all this time, I can't believe we'll end up together. No, the road that got us where we are is anything but smooth, and it took us what it felt like forever to be back in each other's arms. But back we are... on our journey to forever.

-

"Yes, I'm sure! WE ARE WAITING. We won't deny your parents and my mother the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity of being in our wedding and spoil it by eloping!

Beach, garden, I don't care. Basta at the end of the aisle, you'll be there."
His hands began wandering and spanned my waist with his hands.

"Stop that! I have to get dressed and the last time you did that, well... my intention to go to work went out the window. So now, I'm settling to doing my chores!"

"But you smell so good..." He said kissing my nape, making me weak. "And besides, I already gave in and gave up the idea of going for a quickie wedding in Vegas, don' t I get some sort of reward?"

I kissed him modestly on the lips. "There satisfied?" I mischievously asked him. "You have got to be kidding me?!!!"

And suddenly, I found myself upturned, with him hovering over me. And then I found myself a mouthful of Kiefer.

And there was no talking left for awhile.

-

"Bangon na, you might as well go with me, because any attempt at leaving you behind always end up with us being horizontal. And I really have to finish a lot, so please, come with me na?"

"Who am I to argue..." He smugly remarked.

I rolled my eyes and started looking around for my clothes when I heard his groan... "Babe, stop bending over! Kakabihis ko lang, I hate to undress again.

Bigla akong napatayo and mock-glared at him. I picked the nearest thing I could found which happened to be a brush, threw it at him sabay takbo sa bathroom... I took a look back and shout-whispered "Pervie!" At him sabay kandado ng pinto.

I really have to go out na. And I can't let him see this gigantic grin on my face.

Malaki na ang ulo niya, no need to add to that!

I looked at the mirror seemingly seeing a stranger for the first time - a happy stranger, but a stranger no less. It's been forever since I've been this happy.

No surprise that it all ends and begins with the guy trying to barge in, no wait, he's reduced himself to begging. As if maniniwala pa ko sa kanya.

"Nagamit mo na yan kanina, it won't work again!" I laughingly teased as I turned the overhead showerhead and sang and sang...

Five Years Ago
NAIA Terminal 3

From my vantage point, I can see him saying his last goodbyes to tito, tita, Dani, Thirdy, Pauly and some of his teammates.

"Hindi ka man lang ba magpapaalam? You don't know how long before he comes back."

"Things are... over between us."

"Then what are you doing here hiding, no, what are you doing here, period?"

"I wanted to see him one last time. I know what they say about setting someone free and if you're meant to be together they'll come back and all that crap. Pero this is real life J.
He's a good-looking, popular, extremely talented person. The next girl won't be as stupid as me let him go. I hope. He deserves happiness."

"Paano naman ikaw... Don't you?"

I can't respond anymore dahil I'm trying to catch my breath. Sa sobrang pagpigil ko umiyak, magkaka-asthma ata ako.

"Please... Say goodbye properly at least."

"If I - if I go there, baka hindi ko mapigil sarili ko and I might ask him to stay or wait for him. I don't wanna hold him back.

I turned down his proposal for a reason. He deserves soooo much better than to settle in a PBA team when he can reach for the stars. He's lucky NBA came knocking a second-time around.

I can't let him be stuck here because of me. He deserves to show the world what fucking world-class Ravena talent is...."

"Mika... We thought you got confused because of..."

"I know. I know what you thought. But if I told anyone of you guys why I said no, you'd tell him and then he'd be back to where he started.."

"What?! Happy with you?"

"No. Contented. By my side.
He's an ambitious guy, and I'm a weight around his neck he won't let go."

"So you let us wonder and doubt your feelings for him?"

"It didn't matter, it doesn't matter. I know what I feel for him. He'll always have my heart.
And that's why I'm asking you not to say anything."

"Mikaaa..."

"Please, don't let the pain I caused him be for nothing. He may succeed or may not in America, but at least he didn't give it up without trying, at least he didn't give it up for me.
Who knows if he really can measure up in NBA? He may be eaten alive. But if I've learned one thing from that amazing guy, 'oh wells are better than what ifs''
Let him have this shot. Don't say anything, promise me. "

She nodded even as she wiped her tears.

I heard the last boarding call for his flight and I said my goodbyes behind a wall.

Slay 'em mi superstar. Same beast, different animal, right?

I don't know what happened but the next thing I opened my eyes, I was staring at a white ceiling with IV Lines attached to me and monitors beeping.

He's gone, I've well and truly pushed him out for good...

And as the reminder of the pain of what I had to do haunted me, I succumbed to the darkness for the second time in hours.

***

Bipolar chapter. I just want to establish the pain of the past that leads to a happy future.

P.S. Not really advertising this story since I've gone totally fan-fiction on this one and I'm really not confident at how this would be received.