Do not flirt in kindergarten. I swear if you do, I will eat your spine and give my friend your spleen.
Do not flirt in first grade, I will steal your ears if you do.
Do not flirt in second grade, if you do, I will steal your toes and give them to my other friend.
Do not flirt in third grade, I swear I will eat your eyeballs and they will pop like
gushers.
Do not flirt in fourth grade, I will chop off your hair and shove it down your esophagus.
Do not flirt in fifth grade, I will find your house and steal your shoes.
Yay, now your in middle school. You can flirt now, right?
WRONG.
Do not flirt in sixth grade, you will become the center of all the relationship drama and have your tiny pubescent heart broken as you blast emo teen music while staying up past your bedtime.
Do not flirt in seventh grade, if you do, I will rip off your arms and shove them down your esophagus.
Do not flirt in eighth grade. If you go to the same high school with your ex or the people who started drama about your relationship, you will suffer.
Yay, success. You're in high school now. So here's what you're probably thinking, can I flirt now?
YES! TO SOME EXTENT!
In your first year of high school, you may want to GENTLY flirt. Like a friendly 'I like you!' Flirt. Not full blown 'I LOVE YOU AND I WANT TO GET MARRIED AND HAVE BBYS' flirting. Because that's just wrong.
In your second year of high school, you're okay to flirt. You can flirt a bit more than you did in your first year of high school.
Alright, it's your last year of high school. Go crazy. But not to crazy. Don't make people file a restraining order on you.
