I don't know how to feel, what to think. It didn't seem real, not for one bit. It just all felt like a nightmare that I couldn't wake up from. Once it did hit, it hurt, it hurt a lot. Just to much to handle. No rope to grab on to, just falling deeper and deeper in my own head.
How are you suppose to go on? What do you say when people ask how you're feeling. Should I just smile and say everything is fine, or just cave in with every thought of her. You want to be happy for her, but deep down you know that's a lie. You want her to be happy with you and no one else.
Do I still tell the truth? Do I say what she means to me? Just be honest and spit it all out? What would be wise. Will shit just get more fucked up when I do tell? My head is to busy going over every possible outcome to even have a normal conversation. The smallest small talk in the world takes up almost all of my energy.
How am I just gonna forget it all, make everything and everyone just go away. Pretend this never happend. How do I go on?
