Henrietta Potter || Draco Malfoy

19 - Numb

I opened my eyes, shutting them instantly again as sunlight blinded me. For a wonderful, blissful, ignorant moment, I had no recollection of the previous night's events.

And then it all came flooding back; hitting me like a ton of bricks. My chest went tight and I felt a heaviness in my heart. I curled up tightly, trying to squeeze the pain out of me.

The graveyard. Lord Voldemort. Cedric.

"Hey, Etta, it's alright."

Hermione leant over my bed and started stroking my hair. It was then that I realised I was crying.

Hermione crawled into bed with me, wrapping her arms comfortingly around my shaking body. She stayed like that until my sobbing subsided.

"We should go down for something to eat," Hermione said gently after a while.

I recoiled at the idea of ever leaving this dormitory. The thought of facing everyone made my stomach twist violently and filled me with a cold terror.

"I know it won't be easy," Hermione continued, moving around the room to find me some clothes. "But Ron and I'll be by your side and you won't have to say anything to anyone. Not even us if you don't want to. But please come and get something to eat."

Reluctantly, I agreed. But only because I knew Hermione would never have taken no for an answer.

I got out of bed with effort; my whole body aching as though I had just ran ten marathons, and then some.

"Madam Pomfrey said you'll be sore for a while," Hermione said, noticing me wincing. And then, to my horror, tears fell from her eyes. "You are so brave, Etta."

"No I'm not," I muttered flatly. "I watched him die. He's dead because of me."

"Don't say that!" Hermione threw her arms around me again. "It's all You Know Who's doing. You couldn't have done anything to prevent it."

I moved away from her, not being able to bear her sympathy.

Once I got dressed, we slowly walked down to the common room. I was grateful only Ron was there, waiting. I couldn't meet his eyes, afraid to see the pity in them.

We all walked silently down to the Great Hall. My heart hammering as we stepped through the doors and were greeted with the quiet, mournful murmurs of students.

The Great Hall was draped in not the usual house colours of red, green, blue and yellow; but black. Black for death.

The chattering stopped as we walked over to the Gryffindor table. I kept my eyes firmly down at my feet and tried not to listen to the low murmurs and furtive whispers around us. I could feel hundreds of eyes boring into me. My hands started sweating and I felt a wild panic build in my chest. I could not do this.

As if sensing my discomfort, both Ron and Hermione grabbed my arms and gently coaxed me down to a seat at the table, glaring at everyone around us.

"It's OK," Ron whispered in my ear. "Just pretend it's just me and Hermione here with you." He held my hand comfortingly under the table. Hermione held the other.

When Dumbledore stood up to say his end of year speech I switched off. I didn't want to listen. My eyes wandered involuntarily over to the Slytherin table. A loud ringing started up in my ears as I saw Draco Malfoy whispering furtively with Crabbe and Goyle. Sons of Death Eaters.

As if sensing my glare, Draco looked up. His cold grey eyes pierced into mine. The sneer on his face was unmistakable. My heart thudding in anger, I looked away.

***

I stared miserably back up at the castle as I stepped onto the train. I had never felt so empty and low in my life. The thought of going back to the Dursley's depressed me; but being here at the castle depressed me even more so.

There were too many reminders of Cedric; of what we had and of what could have been. He had been one of the kindest and sweetest people I had ever known. The tragedy and injustice of his life being cut so horrifically short made me feel sick to the bones.

Morosely, I made my way down the train corridor, dumping my luggage in a mid carriage storage compartment. I froze as someone entered behind.

"Trying not to think about it, Potter?" A soft, drawling voice spoke into my ear. "Trying to pretend it hasn't happened?"

"Get away from me." I seethed, my voice shaking in anger.

I spun round and Draco's smirking face was just inches from mine. I recoiled in disgust.

Before I could push past him, he reached up, grabbing my wrists.

"You've picked the losing side, Potter!" He snarled, his face so close to mine that I could feel hot breath tickle my cheek. "I warned you! I told you you ought to choose your company more carefully, remember?"

His fingers squeezed my wrists even tighter, the pain making my eyes sting.

"Get your fucking hands off me, Malfoy," I gritted through clenched teeth, straining against his strong grip.

"Too late now, Potter!" He continued, ignoring me. "Your little friends will be the first to go, now the Dark Lord's back! Mudbloods and Muggle-lovers first! Well - second - Diggory was the f-"

That did it. I head butted him as hard as I could. Draco's head whipped violently back, specks of blood flying in the air. He staggered back in surprise, releasing my wrists to clutch at his bloody nose.

My forehead throbbed in pain, but I didn't care. It had been worth it.

"That's for Cedric."

I pushed past him, pausing at the door to give him one last parting shot.

"Oh, and send my regards to your Daddy dearest. Tell him the other night really was a pleasure."

I smirked, slamming the door behind me.

I walked up the train to find Ron and Hermione, my step a little lighter.

But it was with a heavy heart when we arrived in London and I turned to my friends to say goodbye.

The three of us hugged one another hard, promising to write. Neither of us wanted to part, and I especially did not want to return to the Dursley's where I was unloved, unwanted and abused.

"You'll be fine," Hermione assured me, kissing my cheek. "I'm sure Dumbledore will arrange for you to stay at the Weasley's before we return to school."

"Yeah," Ron agreed as he playfully ruffled my hair. "I'll make sure to badger Mum every day. She'll have you round in no time, if only just to shut me up."

"I love you guys," I whispered tearfully, throwing my arms back around them.

We held onto one another a little longer this time, neither of us knowing what Lord Voldemort's return would mean for us all.

***