Pure Darkness With a Spark (Twilight Fanfic)

Chapter 3

Darkness, that's all I see... For miles and miles stretched out in front of me. There is nothing here in this gloomy world, not even gravity can keep its hold. But there is something, I'm not certain of what it is or even what it means but I feel something tugging me.

It's like a piece of jewelry at the bottom of a pond reflecting the moon light. Only you don't know what it is and you're being dragged deeper and deeper into the deep pit of despair that is now your life to find it. But once you find that jewel, you will have reason to come back to the surface. It will be your spark of reason in life.

I need to comeback, to wake up, to see my beautiful Edward and tell him.

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There was a soft pillow pressed up against my face smelling like linen... My right hand is embarrassed in what feels like two quite larger ones, seeping warmth into my body. This feeling, this feeling of warmth, it was strange... Not like the cold of my beloved. 

"Ed..Edward..." I said with what felt like a thick fog coming out of my throat chocking me. 

But before someone could answer I locked gaze with those deep chocolate brown eyes that held my past from the past couple days. With that, all of it came back to me like a slap in the face. The air in my lungs left with a whooshing sound drying up my mouth. My eyes widened while tears leaked from them. Only these were soft tears, nothing like before. These were tears of grieving and sorrow. 

"Bella, it's me. You're fine. Everything is going to be okay." Jake reassured me taking one hand and wrapping it around my face. 

"Jake..." I shocked out, and then my world froze up. 

I took hallow breaths barely moving my body with tears silently gliding down my pale checks as realization unraveled itself before me. 

My world, it's not over, no its worse...it's going to continue... My goal is to now find reason in my life again. I'm clearly meant to live this life; I just need to figure out what it is. I need reassurance again, my safe harbor, my shinning moon light to guide me through this darkness. I'm not weak, no I'm strong...I just need to prove to myself and others this. 

"Bells. Bella are you okay.....Isabella say something." Jake insisted. 

"I'm sorry." I squeaked out. 

"What." he said kind of astonished. 

"Jake I'm so sorry for everything. You didn't deserve to be put through any of that I'm so sorry for the way I was acting. I wasn't thinking at all, I'm so irresponsible and selfish you must hate me now-"  

"Of course I don't hate you." He cuts me off. "I mean I certainly wasn't planning on any of that happening but hey I'm fine. It's you that we need to be worried about." He said with the sweetest hint of a smile on his face. 

Seeing his face with so much hope in it made me think. Truly that hope that he was portraying wasn't for him, no it was for me. Me the girl that nearly tried to kill him the other day. Me. I needed to stay for Jake if not anyone else. 

I freed my hand from his and wrapped both of my arms around his neck pulling him to me. He responded by gripping me to him with such a reassuring hold. 

"I wanna go home." I whispered through the tears. "I want my own bed, hell I wanna shower after all this" 

I heard Jake chuckle into my hair. 

"I'm going to go talk to the Nurse and see about getting you out by today" Jake promised as untwined us. 

"Here eat this, I'll get us some real food once we leave" he said as he handed me the hospital food from the side table.

"Thanks Jake, I really mean it."