Dark Roses

Preface - Desolation

Rolling down my sleeves to hide the cut marks that are still visible even from afar, I stare at my reflection on my standing mirror and it smiles back at me. 

It is another Monday, another day to try to understand what benefits high school has ever offered me. Picking up my backpack, I walk down our narrow stairway, carefully avoiding the edges as I scream for my mother. I have a fear of heights, and this includes any space that isn't flat in my own eyes. 

"Are you ready?" she asks as she glances over me, to make sure I look presentable enough for school. "I know that you need a new school uniform, I promise to get one for you as soon as I can, It's obvious that you have outgrown this one" 

My mother is an elementary school teacher, and her earnings are barely enough to put a roof over our heads and food on our table; yet she has high hopes that somehow she can provide all of my needs. I smile at her and walk towards the door.

"Arike, are you sure you do not want me to take you to school?"

I nod my head, hoping that was the answer she expected as I walk out into the sunlight and madness of the typical Lagos mornings. 

I have a theory; I strongly believe that I have an angel that watches over me. How else would you explain how I can mindlessly survive the mornings as I struggle to get to my school. I am not one to pay heed to the roads, or even try to stay safe; I mostly just move and I am always able to find my way. 

However, today is different; I am walking consciously for 10 minutes before I see the clouds start to get gloomy and rain drops slowly begin to caress my skin. This is the first time the rain is touching me, at least the first time I can remember; so I stop, in a bid to enjoy the moment and immerse myself in what feels like a blessing. It is pure bliss until I hear that sound, the sound of my head hitting the hard wet floor, my eyes become blurry with tears, or is that water? i can't tell the difference. Then slowly all the sound around me, the cars, the rain, people shouting, begins to fade away as my eyes close in gentle rest. 

Today is a day I would never forget.