Sally Sloth stood in her helicopter amongst a unit of George marines. Around her flew the rest of her battalion, sitting in helicopters piloted by the best of the best. They were all GTA pros. Ahead of the helicopter squadron flew George in his customised F-16.
"How far to the landing site?" Sally asked her pilot, Glenda Gazelle.
"ETA 1 minute sir," Glenda replied.
"Ok SOLDIERS," Sally shouted at her marines. "We're about to reach the landing site. So load your guns, and let's kill some coppers!"
The marines cheered and stamped their feet.
1 minute later, the choppers and George's plane touched down outside Carrot Road Police station, the biggest station in Peppatown. Most of the towns cops were hiding out there, barricading the doors and armed with shotguns and glocks.
"Let's go, go, go!" Sally screamed at all the marines in the battalion. All seven helicopters dropped their troops and emptied their machine guns into the door, which blasted open. The frightened guard was turned into a pile of meat and blood.
"Move forward SOLDIERS!" she shouted, and the marines ran into the police station. The first wave were absolutely massacred as they stepped inside. Those 20 marines were ambushed by 5 cops with machine guns and were obliterated.
"Pull back!" George yelled. The remaining 80 marines stopped in their tracks.
"We need a new plan, sir," Sally Sloth said to George.
"Well no shit, sherlock," George replied. He thought for a moment before saying "ah, I have an idea! Bart Beaver, pass me your grenade."
Bart did as he was told. George whipped out his cigarette lighter and covered the grenade in oil. He set it alight and tossed it into the police station. Through the windows and the front door, a massive fire could be seen, and the screams of the 5 guards could be heard. Soon enough, the entrance was silent.
"Sir, the scout has returned with intel on the station," Sally told George, pointing to Chad Chameleon.
"What do you have for me, soldier?" George asked him.
"Well, sir, the cops have booby trapped the whole place. They've got sentries at every hallway. The main force has bunkered themselves into the cellar, with a machine gun at the door and wine and bread to keep them going."
"Ugh, wine is for babies. I was drinking Russian vodka by the time I was 2. This will be easy," George replied. "I'll send in the marines as cannon fodder and go in after them. Isaac Iguana, send in your unit."
"Aye sir," Isaac replied nervously. He'd clearly heard about the booby traps.
--
Mummy Pig stood on top of a burnt out police car, looking at the townies who hadn't joined George's forces.
"Ahem," Mummy Pig said. "Uh, hello everyone. As you know, George is being a piece of shit and has taken over the town. I wish I'd never given birth to that ham roast."
The crowd murmured in agreement. Pedro Pony stepped forward. "Mummy Pig, you can't blame yourself. It's clear to me that George has Daddy Pig's DNA. Have you seen that man's stomach?"
This time the crowd roared with their approval. Pedro turned to face them. "I think it's clear what we need to do. For years Mummy Pig has kept our shitty town free of murderers and psychos. Now we need to repay her. Her army is dead, we can help her make a new one!"
The crowd cheered once more. "I assume everyone brought their guns," Pedro said. In unison, the town reached into their trousers and pulled out their AK-47s.
"Now, soldiers of the new Mummy Pig army, let's take back our town from that little fucktard!"
The citizens could not contain themselves. The raised their guns in the air and screamed in agreement. Mummy Pig and Pedro turned and marched towards the town hall.
--
Peter Pig and Bobby Bull sat playing cards and drinking beer infused with an unnamed drug. They were reviewing their plans for Operation Bacon one last time when there was a knock on the rock that was the roof.
"Who is it?" the mayor asked.
"Constable Topo Gigio," the voice replied.
"Password?" Bobby asked.
"George is scum and he should rot in hell as he is roasted on a spit covered in swiss cheese."
"Ok, come on down," Bobby said.
Topo Gigio opened the rock and walked down into the room where Bobby and Peter were sitting.
"'Sup, Gigio," Peter said. Gigio was one of the most badass cops in the Peppatown force. Plus, he was Italian and had a super-sexy accent.
"Heyo Peter," Gigio replied.
"What brings you here, constable?" the mayor asked.
"Well, I've got some good news and bad news. The bad news is that George's forces have the police HQ under siege. The good news is that the HQ is part of Jamie Jackal's forces, and everyone knows he's a total player and he never even smokes."
"True, true," Peter muttered.
"FUCK!" Bobby roared. "Now we only have the reserve units. Peter, call Jacob at the reserve precinct and tell him that the situation is serious. And tell him that his ass is gonna get whooped by me if he doesn't get down here right now."
