I'm just trying to get though life without going back to cutting or drinking, but it's so hard. I need someones support. This is also is about me bitchin' about life. This is also straight out my diary, so yeaah.😬
11/4/19: My slushie tastes like cigarettes. My dream last night was weird. Thor and Loki banged me. It's just another fucked by the gods dream.( I liked it). Like , guys I was pregnant in it. The Birch looks like a good movie.(those who've watched it, plz tell how it is). I'm at moms work and my step dad texted that he wants to talk to mom alone/ without me. Either it's about 1.) the bloody band aids from my cuts. 2.) the cigar I stole and planned on smoking it. I might as well start packing to get sent away again. (for the 3rd time in the last 3 years) within the last 3 years Ie been home for only 5 months.
11/5/19: Ok there is a guy I like at school he's cute really tall 😳(btw everyone is tall to me I'm '5'2). His pink hair is like frosting. I wish I knew is name. Iḿ not gonna fall for him, I have Kurt😍💕. Sorry I haven't wrote that much. I've been busy (doing nothing) 😁. I've been helping Nana (my grandma) all day cause there was no school.
11/7/19: I had school yesterday and today. Sorry I didn't wright anything yesterday. Mr.Hammer reset my science class. Now I'm pissed. Ugh!😤.
11/12/19: Today flew by fast.
11/14/19: Never thought I'd see the day I get jump scared and it was at school. I made a weird sound and some kids laughed. MO-MO did it. It was a MO-MO game. I was wondering what MO-MO looked like because brother Mikey wants to call it. Out of love of horror movies and creepy things I said yes, but i didn't know what MO-MO is so I looked (her?) up. honestly I thought hewas talking about our sister molly cause sometimes we call her MO-MO. Sadly it wasn't. I never get jump scared. I'm so mad at MO-MO. A**hole MO-MO. Now everyone in school... Don't be watching demonic sh*t at school. I spelled hungry. I wrote "the radical republicans got hungry. I looked at it again and thought what is wrong with me, am I hungry?
11/18/19: I like feeding the "tamed animals". You know how there's a don't feed animals sign at zoos and parks well there should be a few at school. Kids at school asks for my food and I want an excuse to not give them food. I woke up at 3 am and haven't fallen back to sleep yet.
11/19/19: I showed Jesse's YT channel. She said that he's cute. Mom and not-dad wants me to stop talking about death. honestly I shrugged it off because it's stupid.
11/21/19: Meds don't feel right anymore. Nothing feels right anymore. The voice inside my head tells me to stop but everyone IRL tells me to take them.
11/22/19: Nana pick me up from school for a doctor appointment but asked for Natalie instead of Parker. For those who don't know my real name is Natalie but I want to be called Parker. The only thing I'm keeping from my real name is my middle name but even that I might change it to Onyx. Now you're might be asking what about my last name I'm changing it to Kurt's.
11/25/19: ...umm I need some action in my life. I might be giving up on Kurt. He never emails back. I kinda like this guy named Jamal. Hopefully he comes over tomorrow.
AND REMEMBER EVERYONE...
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hereś some messed up sh*t
This one is to my brother Dominic (aka legend nebula)
lol im sorry if this offends you. this is what i do with probelms, i joke like a dumb a*s
