Closer {Foah}

•T w o• - Finn

I swear I love Jack so much, and I know that he would NEVER do anything of the sort, but it's for the storyline. (EDIT: Well....... This didn't age well 😬) BUT, double update? Yes qween. Enjoy!

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

Jack is such an asshole. I swear, I never wanted to break Noah's heart. I love him to bits and pieces.

You might be a little confused, me saying that. 'You're with Jack, isn't that cheating?' NO. Here's the full story:

Obviously I'm a part of the IT cast, playing the role of Richie Tozier. The rest of the cast consists of Jaeden, Wyatt, Jeremy, Chosen, Sophia, and... Jack.

I love them all just as much as I love the ST cast (minus Noah, I love him differently), like brothers and sisters to me. When Jack heard about me and Noah, he was furious. Mine and Jack's characters in the movie were gay for each other, and he though that it was like that in real life too. He had confessed to me his feelings, but I told him that Noah had my heart and always will. He seemed to have calmed down for the most part, until one day he just started threatening me. He said that if I didn't break up with Noah and get together with him, he'd hurt Noah more then I can imagine. I didn't even ask what he would do; I didn't want my baby to get hurt.

So, I broke it off. Noah was so heartbroken, and it hurt me so bad to do it. But I had to. I'd do anything to keep him from getting hurt by Jack, but he just got hurt from me. I want to protect him from any physical harm. Jack said that he would figure out if we were together secretly, so to not even try that.

I hate what I've done, I hate what Jack has done. I just want my smol bean back. He's the moon to my stars, my one and only. I love him more then the amount of atoms that make up this universe, and would die if it meant he would be happy.

My anxiety is out of control now, and it keeps getting worse. Noah could fix it, he CAN fix it, but now that I pushed him away it's come back and stronger then ever. Small things trigger my anxiety attacks, and I hate it.

Even coming to film S4 has made me really anxious. It means that I have to face Noah and the reality of what Jack made me do.

I'm currently back in Atlanta at our filming locations, getting ready for our first read-through of the first episode. I sat down in my chair with the name Finn Wolfhard in front of it. I looked at the scripts beside me; one said Gaten Matarazzo, and the other one said... Noah Schnapp. Just my luck. I mean, our characters are in fact dating, so I'd understand that. One by one, people started filling the room. Gaten and Caleb were really excited to see me and everyone else (which made me feel a bit better). Millie gave me a friendly hug and said that she missed me. Even though she's really close to Noah, she's still treated me nicely and loved on me. Sadie also hugged me, and she told me that she was really happy to start filming again.

Then, a beautiful boy walked through the doorway, handsome as ever. His hair was perfectly trimmed, and had his iconic hairstyle. He was wearing a Nike hoodie with some black ripped jeans, and a pair of Adidas on. Perfect boy.

Millie and Sadie ran over to him and engulfed him in a giant bear hug. He started laughing, and smiled a genuine smile. That smile that made me melt...

His eyes flickered over to mine, and his face dropped immediately. I looked back down at my phone, and cursed myself for staring. I talked to Gaten a little bit before the Duffers and Shawn Levy silenced us. Noah sat down hesitantly beside me, and didn't look at me.

"Hello to all my favorite people!" Shawn said happily. "This season is going to be filled with lots more action, drama, monsters, and most of all: romance."

Everyone started clapping, and I smiled to myself.

The Duffers started talking about the basics of the first episode, and how we all need to be practicing our lines; the different emotions that flow through what our characters are saying.

"Especially Noah and Finn. You guys are the big conflict of the season, and it's gotta be big. You guys hear that?" Ross said.

I looked over at Noah, who was also looking over at me. We looked away from each other quickly, and nodded to him.

"Great!" Matt started to talk about the other characters, and I was kind of listening, but I was also zoned out some. I kept fiddling with the hem of my shirt.

"Okay! Lest read through the first episode, shall we?" Shawn said, and everyone started cheering.

I open my script and I look at the first scene. I read through my lines, along with Noah's.

After reading through a million hours of lines (well, an hour to be exact), Shawn started to talk to us. "Okay, now that this episode has been read through, time to go back to your condos and freshen up for tonight's cast dinner! You are all dismissed, except for the kids who need their condo assignments."

The six of us kids gather by Shawn, and he starts explaining it. "As you all probably predicted, we will stay the same as last year. Mille and Sadie, Gaten and Caleb, Finn and Noah. Now you all can go!"

This is going to be the longest and hardest season to film.. especially since I have to live with Noah. If only he knew what was happening. If only he knew how much I still completely and utterly love him...

HEYO PEEPS! Sorry that this is so long lol, but what do you think about the IT cast being a part of this book a lil bit? It sounds fun for them to be in a chapter or two... what do you think? Oki ima leave and sleep now. BYEEEEEE!