The Muted Boy

Chapter 8: Spring Time

It was a long few months with hardships but spring was finally coming along. I breathed in deeply as I walked into the flower garden. I spotted my sunflower and smiled. I still dont talk unless it's for work, Johnny, or Shiro. My voice was strong enough from those few things and my parents were always busy with the baby so I didn't have to worry too much. Except when dad remembered that I was a disappointment. From time to time he would hit me but the more sober he got the less they acknowledged me. I sat on the dirt and opened my phone. I had managed to pay Johnny back, take over payments, and buy a fancy touch phone. I even had over a thousand dollars in my account. We had two more months before our plans took off. I smiled as I read the text on my screen. 'Meet me in the flower garden.' It wasn't often he and I got to meet up in the day. Between our two work schedules and his father being worse than mine. I frowned at the thought. Soon we will be away from here and life will be better. I heard soft foot steps and looked up to see grey eyes. My heart always melted before him. He held out his hand and I took it standing up. "This reminds me of our first night together." I smiled and hugged myself. Even though I spoke often it was still hard. I mostly did it so I could do my job. "We graduate soon and I know we have enough to leave but." He stopped midsentence looking down. Does he not want to leave after all? Is he breaking up with me? Oh no what am I going to do? "I was thinking we leave the day after graduation. Not the night of. That way you can spend one more night with Johnny." Once I got home the first thing I noticed was the stillness. This type of energy hadn't been around since the baby was born, I got a job, and hadn't been home enough for mom and dad to hit and yell at me. I closed the door softly behind me and as I reached the stairs I saw my mother at the top of the stairs. She looked so disheveled. Her hair was knotted and tangled together. In her right hand she held a bottle of Jack Daniels and I realized her eyes were blood shot. In her left hand she held a cigarette. She brought the lit smoke to her lips and took a deep drag before letting out a deep breath. She took a step down the stairs and looked at me. "You are the disappointment of this house hold. Your voice is ugly and degrading and so is your face. You were the mistake I made and when I realized that you were a part of me it was too late to get rid of you. The doctor said it would eb illegal and considered murder. Can you believe that! I would have gone to jail to abort you at 5 months! Sure your sister wasn't planned but at least she was a girl, beautiful, and a real part of this family." What does she mean she was? She took another drag and took another step before taking a swig from the bottle. "Have you ever thought of the fact that you look nothing like me or your father? I mean sure you have my blonde hair but have you ever wondered how the fuck did I get these stupid ugly and pitiful green eyes? That's because you're not a real part of this family. Your father and I had a fight and I slept with his step brother. He was so small and insufficient. Not like Mike. God he is an amazing lover. His step brother on the other hand... I've never seen such a small penis on someone as I did that night. You probably take after him in that department as well. If your sister dies then so do you. I am so sick of taking care of an unwanted ungrateful child." What is she talking about!? Am I really a bastard child? What does she mean if Lily lives? I looked at her. I could feel tears trying to make their way to my eyes but I fought the urge. I am done showing weakness to these people. I may have her blood but that does not make her my mom. "Lily went to the hospital for pneumonia and they don't think she is going to make it." I saw tears leaving her eyes and for a moment I felt sympathy. I had never seen her cry before. It didn't last long though as she continued to stare at me and take another swig. Her eyes then turned into hatred. "I hate you!" She then threw the bottle at me. If I hadn't ducked it would have hit me right in the head. The glass shattered behind me as it hit the wall and she finished stumbling down the stairs. "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!" She looked into my eyes and I looked back. There was a moment of silence before I spoke. "And I hate you." I turned away from her and went upstairs to my room and began packing my things. If they feel this strongly then so be it. I will just leave now.