I'm a Celebrity 2019! // Roman Kemp

Episode 9

The camp was empty when we arrived back after the challenge since the other four had left for their part of the mission. Nadine, Myles, Kate and Andy I mean. 

To win a care package from home... it would just mean the absolute world to me. It really would.

"You alright?", Roman asked me as he folded up some things. I shrugged my shoulders, sitting on my old bed that I actually miss quite a lot. "Feel a bit shit, innit?", I mumble in response. I felt overwhelmed with guilt after losing those three stars on the last trial we did. "Hey, look at me...", he trailed off in reply as he dropped the jacket he was folding and approached me. I looked up at him as he sat next to me. "I'm gutted too but I'm certain that nobody else could've done it better too", he coaches as he rubs my arms. "Stop beating yourself up over it yeah? We tried our best and hopefully everyone can see that", he trailed off as I wrapped my arms around his waist, pulling him into a comforting hug. He responded gladly as he squeezed me tightly. 

"Anyhow... what did you think of the trial then? Did you get like proper deja vu?", he laughed as we pulled out of the hug as I stand up to stretch slightly. I laughed lightly, remembering the feeling of walking into that trial. "It was weird, like really weird, I kind of miss it in a weird way", I trailed off as he nodded for me to continue. "I miss being able to do absolutely nothing every day, lounging around with my best friends and then, you know, having a boyfriend", I continue smiling. "You miss your ex?", he asked as he lay backwards, he hands crossed behind his head. "Nah, I don't miss Mike... we're still mates, we just didn't work out on the outside and we both accept that. He's got a new girlfriend now I think", I answer as he raises his eyebrows. "That was quite quick", he replied. "Yeah, I suppose but I mean, if I found a guy I really liked I wouldn't be appalled to get to know him just because of my love life being so public so far, you know?", I opened up to him as he looked at me with an emotion in his eye that was unexplained.

"Anyone in particular then?", he smirked, nudging me with his elbow making me laugh breathlessly. "Not that I can think of", I stuttered out shyly, yet trying to seem confident and failing. He nodded in acceptance before James broke our conversation in a rant about our misportioning  of beans recently. "Well who's the camp cooks?", I called out as he looked at me. "Well, Myles and Nadine but I'm not gonna have a go at them", he replied. I rolled my eyes slightly, "James, babe, you need to bring it up to them at least. We're starving in the morning for no reason when we could have so much more food. I get that it's bland but it's still better than nothing", I complain. He nods in agreement and with that the conversation is dropped. 

"If someone said to you, you can either not have sex for the rest of your life or not eat for the rest of your life...", Roman asked as we all lounged around the camp a short while later. "Well we all know what Amelia is picking", Adele winked to me as a reference to my time on Love Island as I shoved her from beside me. Adele and I had formed a very sisterly bond in here with her being the annoying younger sister, even though I'm younger, and myself being the torturous older sister. "Shut up", I laughed to her making her laugh harder, along with the rest of the camp. "She ain't wrong though...", I smirk making everyone laugh much more. "Cliff?", Roman asked. "I've had too much sex... just give me the food", he chuckles making everyone smile. "Amelia, I'm sorry if this makes you uncomfortable but did you actually have sex in there?", Caitlyn asked politely making me laugh slightly. "It's been asked a lot, don't worry and the answer is yes... I loved him and I don't regret it", I shrugged locking eyes with Roman to see him already staring at me, but looks to the floor when I look at him. 

"Good on you baby", she laughed in reply reaching over to give me a high five to which I did. "I got a lot of shit for that but I don't care", I continued as everyone agreed with me. Eventually night fell as we all lounged around but jumped up upon the sound of multiple footsteps approaching camp. In walked the four others as we jumped up to greet them. "How was it then, how did you do?", I asked anxiously as I stood beside Nadine. "We got three care packages...", Myles trialled off as we applauded them because I couldn't imagine how difficult it could've been. "... but inside of those three there were four care packages, so we got twelve!", he finished as we all jumped and cheered loudly, me grabbing onto Nadine and hugging her tightly as she laughed. "It was actually so fun", he laughed in my ear as I pulled back. "Tell me everything", I smiled as we sat down. 

Roman had informed Andy that he, Ian and Cliff missed out on roast dinners and I was grateful that he had done it instead of me. Andy approached me as I hugged him carefully, "I'm really sorry you didn't get the dinner", I mumbled shamefully in his shoulder. He rubbed my back as he hushed me immediately. "Don't worry your pretty face love, I know you and Roman did you absolute best now hush, I've got my care package", he calmed me as he rubbed my arms up and down as I nodded hesitantly. 

Andy has the kindest soul bless him... I just can't help the guilt for letting him down so badly, along with Cliff and Ian and I'm gutted I couldn't get him the nice things he was able to get me. 

"I feel awful", I shrugged to Roman as we walked out of camp to go get our food. He slung his arm around my shoulder. "Same here love... but let's just enjoy our meal, yeah?", he said sweetly as I nodded my head in response. It's safe to say we all absolutely stuffed our faces tonight for dinner and were all too stuffed to talk afterwards. Approaching camp, I knew Caitlyn had brought back food for Ian but chose not to speak about it even though I had a nagging feeling that we would face consequences for that and I felt even more guilt for Cliff and Andy than before considering they got nothing. James came waltzing into camp with a huge basket of care packages as we all sat around the gas fire, ready to open them. Roman and I had chosen to do each other's letters for each other as we listened to everybody's letters and watched as everybody got very emotional. I decided to read Roman's letter first as I tore it open and read it aloud.

"Hey Ro, we miss hearing you on the radio every morning, as you always make us smile. We love you so much and hope that you're enjoying this amazing experience. We are so proud of you. Keep being the lovely person that you are and get stuck into those trials. We love you, lots of kisses", I read with a wide smile and felt myself choke up slightly as I saw his eyes water. I grabbed his hand tightly as he laced his fingers with mine in reassurance and rested his head on my shoulder as he opened up his oreos, splitting one in half and sharing it with me, making me smile. He then grabbed my letter and began to read it aloud, not once letting go of my hand and instead rubbing his thumb along the back of it.

"Hey babygirl, I can't believe you're back on the telly every night being the amazing person you are and showing the world how beautiful you are, inside and out. Your mum and I and your brothers miss you so much and of course your mum cries every night watching you. You continue to make me the proudest dad imaginable every single day of my beautiful daughter and everything you've achieved at such a young age. Keep that beautiful soul of yours and I'll see you at the finish line. We love you so much. Lots of love and kisses, dad", Ro reads out as it's my turn to weep on his shoulder, as my tears stained his shirt. I felt everyone comfort me in some way as I wiped my eyes and opened up my treat, smiling happily to find a few fizzy haribo cherries - my favourites. 

God, It's really tough hearing the messages from home. I miss my family so much, they mean the absolute world to me. 

He handed me the letter as he continued to hold my hand as I read the letter from start to finish but double glanced as I saw a line Roman never read out loud. "P.s. I like that Roman more than I ever did Michael... go for it my darling". I gasped inaudibly as I placed my free hand over my mouth and glanced at Roman to see he was already looking at me with a whisper of a smile on his face, winking at me before listening to Myles letter being read out by Adele. He saw that and now he knows... what the fuck do I do now?

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(A/N) I hope this chapter makes up slightly for me not updating in a few days :) x