Losing Our Battles- A Vikklan, Merome and Poofless Story

⋐Chapter 23 [Vikk]⋑

Vikk's P.O.V.

Lachlan was completely stunned and almost terrified when I showed up on his doorstep, having remembered his address from Mitch. He ushered me inside though and up to his bedroom, avoiding all of his family members, and I collapsed on his bed, shaking and unable to speak. I stayed that way until Lachlan wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest, holding me close until the trembling stopped. My eyes flickered, head falling onto his chest.

"Vikk?" He asked, his voice shaking. "What's going on?"

"I got kicked out." I whispered, half sobbing. "I don't have anywhere to go."

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He let me stay, thank goodness, and I spent that evening curled up on the couch in his bedroom, sleeping listlessly. Lachlan stayed the whole time too because I figured he didn't want to be with his family so to avoid conversation I pretended to be asleep, head tucked under my arm. Sweetly, when he did think I was asleep, he tucked a blanket around me.

I did manage to sleep finally, passing out sometime in the early hours of the morning and waking up just as the birds were beginning to chirp. Lachlan was curled up right in the top corner of his bed, blankets thrown off and still fast asleep, but I couldn't help but watch him for a while. He looked so... small, helpless... He was tucked up right against the wall, forehead actually resting against the wall, seeming like he was trying to get away from everything. Maybe he was?

Lachlan woke up at more of a normal time, when the digital clock on his bedside table showed the time 8:54. There were three bottles of pills sitting on the same nightstand and, from what I could read across the room, they were all antipsychotic medications and, terrifyingly, they were all still unopened and wrapped in plastic. So he hadn't been taking his medication.

The other boy stirred for quite a while, tossing his head and groaning quietly. When he finally blinked and opened his eyes I turned away to make it look like I hadn't been watching him, tucking myself back down facing the back of the couch.

"Are you awake Vikk?" I heard him mumble, yawning slightly. I turned over, still wrapped in a blanket, and nodded. "Do you want something to eat?"

"Yeah, please." I mumbled, my stomach grumbling as another answer. I hadn't eaten since breakfast the previous morning, I think, so I was pretty hungry.

"I'll get some toast. I don't really want anything so if anyone's up they'll think it's for me."

"Are you sure?" I asked, concerned now. "Did you eat yesterday?" He waved me off.

"I'm fine." He said as he disappeared downstairs, leaving me confused and also slightly distressed. If he's wasn't eating and he wasn't taking his meds, what else was he doing that was only exacerbating the symptoms of his schizophrenia? Had he actually been sleeping? Had he been drinking enough water?- wait, no, there was a water bottle on the ground beside his bed. He hadn't been trying to kill himself with a lack of water.

Lachlan came back a few minutes later with a plate of jam and peanut butter toast, which he placed on my lap. In the light I could see that he definitely wasn't looking well at all- he was skinny, pale, black bags under his eyes and seemed to be barely standing. He looked ill.

After handing me the plate he clambered back onto his bed and curled up again, facing away from me.

"Are you feeling okay?" I asked gently, my eyes subconsciously flickering to the bottles of pills.

"Just tired." He mumbled, still facing away. "I'll be right."

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He wasn't alright. He stopped talking after a little while and I thought he was asleep at first, but then he started to mumble to himself. It took me a couple of minutes to realise what was going but when I did it took all I had to remain calm and not freak out- he was definitely hearing things and was having a psychotic episode.

Lachlan's body seemed stuck in the position he was lying in, curled up on his side, like he was locked there. He had completely lost touch with reality. It was pretty clear he was hearing things, voices or otherwise, because he had his hands clamped down hard over his ears like the first time I met him and he was mumbling partially legible responses to whatever they were saying. His eyes were completely vacant, open, but vacant. It was like he wasn't there.

This mumbling continued for quite a few minutes and I managed to restrain myself from touching him because I knew it would only cause him to freak out more. When it finally stopped his hands fell away from his ears and his body relaxed a little but it was like he had fallen asleep. I sat on the end of the bed and watched him, heart still pounding, not knowing how long he might stay like this.

When he began to toss his head I moved closer, placing a hand on the inside of his wrist.

"Lachlan?" I whispered, trying to keep my voice quiet. "Are you there? Lachy?"

He blinked his eyes a little at the nickname before finally opening his eyes, appearing utterly exhausted. He placed a hand on his forehead, wincing.

"Wh-what happene'?" He mumbled, voice slurred.

"You have an episode Lachlan, it's okay. I know you're tired so just sleep, I'll be here." I whispered, moving my hand from his wrist to his shoulder. "Okay?"

He nodded and, to my surprise, he lifted his head and rested it on my lap, tucking himself right up close to me. I stiffened in surprise but eventually realised that he was going to sleep there and there was nothing I could do about it, so I relaxed. I ran a hand through his hair.

This day had been full of surprises, honestly.

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"I don't really know how to explain it." Lachlan mumbled, leaning up against me. "I don't think I remember a good portion of it but I'll try to get it across."

I nodded and continued the comforting motion of running my hand through his hair. I had stopped a couple of times after he had woken up but all that did was make him let out a distressed whine, so I chose to continue to keep him comfortable.

"Everything's just... a jumble. I can hear a whole lot of voices and some whisper to me but others like to yell. It's been the same group ever since I can remember. Sometimes I see lights or... patterns. Like when you look down a kaleidoscope?" He looked at me to make sure he was making sense and I nodded. "When it's not that bad I often can't think straight and people have thought I was drunk because my speech is so bad. I can't follow along when people talk with me and my parents yell at me because it's like I'm zoning out or being distracted by something else."

Lachlan lapsed into silence after that, all his energy used up through that explanation. I knew he just wanted to sleep again so I moved his head back down onto my lap, whispering comforting words. He was asleep in a couple of minutes.

Sighing a little bit I leaned back against the wall, closing my eyes. Because on top of helping Lachlan, I was also trying to deal with the effects of alcohol withdrawal. I couldn't exactly go downstairs and steal from his family, not when he had so graciously opened his home for me, so I would have to deal with it myself. I had my credit card with money earned from my job- to which I would have to go back to in the next week- but I didn't want to leave Lachlan alone. His family clearly didn't care except for perhaps Mitch but I hadn't seen him all day. Maybe he was out?

Alcohol withdrawal was rough, combining anxiety, headaches, nausea, insomnia, sweating and shaking hands. Of course it was nothing I hadn't experienced before but I had always had alcohol to lessen the symptoms- now, I didn't. I couldn't destroy this.

Glancing down at the boy in my lap, thinking about what had happened earlier today, and then I looked across at his medication. God, he really needed to take them.