11:15 // mendes

Chapter 5

Today, Shawn is leaving for New York City for a couple of days. I'm at his house now with our friends Brian, Ian and Avery to say goodbye. They all give him a hug, then I walk over.

"If anything happens with Nathan, you call me right away," Shawn whispers as we hug.

"Ok," I say.

He gives me a tight squeeze, then Brian, Ian, Avery and I walk out of Shawn's house, we get into my car and drive to McDonald's, since we're all hungry and don't feel like making food. We go inside and order. I get a six piece Mcnugget with buffalo sauce and a small fountain drink.
Once all our food is here, I fill my cup with Coke and sit with my friends. I open my nuggets and start eating. I don't care what the nuggets are made of, I will still eat them no matter what. I take a sip of my Coke, then join the conversation my friends are in, stealing some of Ian's fries.

~

Later that night, I'm up late watching American Horror Story on Netflix. I'm on season two, which is Asylum. After a few episodes, it's already one a.m. I shut my laptop and take my headphones off. I lay down in my bed and stare at the ceiling with many thoughts running through my mind.
Will Nathan come back to hurt me? What will I do if he does? Do I like Shawn? Does he like me back? God, I need to go to sleep.
I sigh, then turn to my side and shut my eyes, attempting to go to sleep.

~

The next day, as I'm getting ready for school, I get a text from Shawn.

"I need advice," he said.

"What's up?" I ask.

"So, I like this girl. I've liked her for a really long time. We talk alot and I think she may like me back. I want to ask her out, but I don't know how," Shawn types.

I clench my jaw. Knowing Shawn likes someone else breaks my heart. Why did I even bother liking him?

"Well, tell her how you feel. Or do something cute to ask her out."

"What kind of cute?"

"I dunno. Think of something."

I set my phone down and ignore the next text that Shawn sends me. God, how could I be so stupid?! I should've known he likes someone else. Someone who's probably prettier, smarter and more athletic than I am. I'm way out of Shawn's league.

I slip off my pajamas and put on black ripped jeans, a 5SOS shirt, black lace up boots and a bigger black and white flannel, which is Shawns. I brush my hair, then do a natural makeup look. I put on a black beanie and grab my backpack. I walk out of the door putting my earbuds in and listening to the Arctic Monkeys AM album.

Once I get to Spanish, Avery immediatly can tell that I'm upset. I tell her it's nothing but she doesn't believe me, but doesn't say anything. I pull out my notebook and answer the questions on the white board. Once I finish, I sneakily play on my phone until the class is over. I walk to Honors English and sit in my seat.

As an assignment, we're reading a book of our choice and doing a report on it. I chose Looking For Alaska. It's probably the best book I've ever read. The way it's written, how it's like a real life situation, and, at the moment, how I'm connected to Pudge. I've fallen hoplesly in love with someone who may never like me back. Pudge and I are one.

~

As I walk back to class from the bathroom, I'm walking alone in the halls. The small heels of my boots are clicking on the tiled flooring sounds nice to me. Why? I don't know. When I get to the Creative Writing room, I sit in my seat next to Ian. The one next to me is empty, since that's where Shawn sits. I work on my free write story for a little bit, then get bored. I play on my phone and listen to music. I play Settle Down by The 1975, then Blood Stream by Ed Sheeran plays. I tap my fingers to the beat, then the bell rings. I gather my stuff, then meet Avery in the hall. We walk to P.E, which is my least favorite class of the day. The only time I like gym is when we are doing the swimming unit.

~

After school, Avery and I decide to go to the mall. We drive there in Avery's car. At the mall, we stop at Jamba Juice and get smoothies, then walk around. I get a few things from Areopostale, Claire's, Pink and Hot Topic. Avery and I get stuff from the food court for dinner, then drive back to her house to do homework and watch a movie.

Once I have to go home, I grab my stuff and walk down the street. As I do, I get a text. When I look, my eyes get wide; it's from Nathan.

"I'm sorry. About everything. Can we talk later?" he asked.

"I don't think so. I'm sorry," I say, then shove my phone in my pocket.

I speed up my pace, then finally arrive at my house. I take my things upstairs and put everything. I play music on my phone and take a warm, well earned shower. Afterwards, I put on cozy sweat pants and a big t-shirt. I lay on my bed and listen to music for the rest of the night.

~

Short chapter, but next one will be better ;)