My life before Julie (Warm Bodies)

SeVeN

"Mom, I'd do anything for you...you know that. Now that dad is gone I have to be here for you" I assure her. 
"Please can we not talk about your dad. I miss him terribly. If we would have known sooner he would be safe." 
"I know" I simply say not knowing what else to say to her. 
"You should have some food Ry. You looked starved" she looks into my eyes. 
"I am, I haven't eaten since before everything happened" 
"Have some turkey bacon. You'll enjoy it" she pushes a plate over to me with turkey bacon on it. 
"Thanks" I say as I take a large bite. 
"What time is it?" Chris' voice asks from behind me. 
"Almost noon" my mom answers. 
"We've been alseep that long?" he asks surprised. 
"You didn't go to bed till like 7. You both should still be asleep" she laughs. 
"So should you mom, you went to sleep only half an hour before we did" 
"Yeah but you have to have your energy up incase some one...or something gets in. I know that banging on the door was a zombie Ry, don't tell me other wise. I saw from the kitchen window, it was hobbling away" she points behind her towards the window, the view of the now broken town that is being destroyed. 
"There was a zombie here?!" Chris jumps. 
"Yeah, for like 3 minutes. It hit its head and ran away" I shrug. 
"You didn't make any attempt to kill it?" he asks.
"No, I wasn't going to open the door" 
"You could have shot at the door, it would have went through" 
"Yeah but it wouldn't have hit is head, then I wasted a bullet and made a zombie angry." 
"You could have tried to kill it" 
"Yeah but what if I didn't. What if I had opened the door, missed, it got in and then ate one of us. Everyone would be dead or zombies. Do you want that, cause I will throw you out if you want." 
He stays quiet looking at me like as if he has nothing more to say, which he doesn't. 
"You can't throw me out of my house Ryan.." he finally says. 
"This isn't your house anymore...this is a shelter for us. To protect us." 
"No, this is my house" he argues. I make no attempt to rebuddle. 
"If you say so" I sigh rubbing my head. 
"Boys, stop fighting. We all need to look at the matter at hand. We are living amongst zombies. Things that use to be our friends and families that now want to eat us, so just quit fighting. Be glad your still alive" my mom shoots. 
I look at her and then Chris and I know not to say anything, so I don't. Chris leaves the room, I am stuck with my angry mom and two pieces of turkey bacon. I stuff the pieces in my mouth and walk out of the room with my gun. 
"So what exactly are we going to do?" Martin says, I didn't know he was awake.
"Were going to watch the news and see how much farther this apocolypse has gone" Chris informs us as he turns on the tv. 
"With the zombie apocolypse approaching a great number of almost 3 thousand we encourage every living being to stay indoors for as long as you can. Do not leave the area you are at for any reason....I just got word that it has reached America. The zombies are in Minnesota." the woman looks afraid. 
"This has gotten way out of hand. They should have killed that woman when they had the chance" my mom says walking in. 
"Now were all trapped like rats, not being able to leave our homes, not knowing when its safe again...will it ever end?" Chris' mom adds. 
"What if were stuck in the house for months, what if we run out of food?" my mom looks freally worried. 
"Mom, it will be alright. We'll take care of it" I say to her. 
"We have footage of what is happening in Quebec." the woman says and the screen shows a small neighboorhood being evacucated from their homes just as the newest batch of zombies attack, people falling and rising as zombies. No one is left in that neighboorhood, all dead. Men, women and even children now walk around as...as walking corpses. Never getting older, never moving forward, stuck like that forever until they get shot in the head. Then what happens, where do they go then? 
This is what I was afraid of...living forever but never aging. I much rather die as a human then a corpse. I look down at my gun, tempted to put it to my head. I examine it, it could be so easy, put to my head and then bam. I'm gone from exsitance. No more worries. No more fear. 
Without permission the gun is at my head, my finger on the trigger. 
"Ryan no!" my mom jumps to me and pulls the gun from my head, taking it in her hands. "What are you thinking!?!" 
"...That if I killed myself I wouldn't have to die as a corpse" 
"A corpse?"
"Thats what they are...isn't it. A walking corpse." I scoff. 
"Whatever, your not going to die as a...corpse. Were going to get through this until-"
"Yeah and what if we don't. What if this is what the world is now. Every second more people are turning. Soon the whole fucking world will be over run. And what will happen to the humans? Eventualy something will happen, something will get in. And there will be no one left. What makes you think just cause were in this house and all the doors are locked that one of them won't get in. Its not even been 24 hours yet and if you look out the window theyre everywhere. They're like fleas, never dying, multiplying. Its just a matter of time before all of us are one of them" I am so close to breaking.  
"Ryan you need to calm down. As long as your calm everything will be okay"
"How is that?! Is that what keeps them out?! Staying calm. No mom, nothing will keep them out. Were fucking stuck in the house and we will be, until one of them can figure out how to get through the god damn door. Then its over" I yell. "You think that some how some way, the problem will be solved but it won't. The world is slowing becoming infested and the human race will cease to exsist" I say a little calmer, taking a seat on the couch. I look up at them and by the look on their faces they were all watching while I went into a mintuare rampage. 
"What if he's right?" Chris looks at the rest of us. "What if this will never get better and were all going to die eventually. Or become a...corpse. A walking corpse feeding off each other" 
"What should we do?" Martin asks. 
"I don't know...we could stay inside until we absoulty need to leave and whatever happens out there happens...or...we could take Ryan's way out and put a fucking bullet through our skulls" I can tell Chris is getting angry. 
"We should just...just wait it out." Chris' mom says. "If we kill ourselves we automatically go to hell. If we get turned and then die, we most likely go to hell. So I much rather live out my life as long as possible before I get thrown in the fiery pits" 
"There is no such thing as heaven and hell mom. Its physco babble" Chris says. 
"Chr-Chris I thought you believed. You said you loved Jesus. You lied to me" 
"Mom i've been lying to you since I could talk. Its something you should know. I think its bullshit" 
"Chris!" my moms shouts and hits him over the head. "Stop it." she glares at him and Chris looks away.