pretty baby // h.s

08 | saturday night.

a.

seven thirty.

in just an hour, harry would be coming by to pick me up for dinner. i was nervous yet excited.

right now i was washing dishes from dinner—chicken soup and roast baby potatoes. i only had a small bowl of soup—no potatoes—as i didn't want to spoil my dinner with harry, but i also didn't wan my dad to suspect anything unusual.

once i was finished, i walked over to my papa's arm chair, and sat on one of the arms as he read this mornings paper.

prohibition was going on but papa had been drinking since before they made it illegal, ever since he was just a boy of sixteen. he knew people and places where he could drink in secret. he's gone to these places before and it usually takes him a while coming back. they were far away, outside the city and away from the many eyes of the police. a place where men could drink without fear of getting caught.

"do you plan on going out later, papa?" i asked nonchalantly.

"i don't know. i might," he responded, "i just don't want you to feel lonely here. i don't get to see you often."

"no, you should go. we have all week to spend time together, maybe even visit momma," i said.

"i don't know, ella."

"papa, it's fine, really. i mean, i'm usually alone anyways, it's nothing new to me." i pressed.

"i hope you're not up to something," he teased, standing up.

"no! of course not papa," i smiled innocently at him.

i took his spot on his chair and leaned back. he got his hat on and his coat from the rack.

"don't have any boys over," he said teasingly, "i'll be back before midnight. don't stay up too late."

i only laughed and shook my head. and then he walked out the door.

"you didn't say i couldn't go out with one," i said quietly, grinning.

i walked towards the window and moved the curtain to the side, watching as he walked further and further away. i went away from the window, just in case if he did come back for whatever reason.

once i knew he was gone for sure, i quickly got up and went into his bedroom. he and momma used to share a room before she stopped coming. his bed was unmade, and had only minimal things in his room. there was a nightstand and a picture of him and momma. on the wall hung individual portraits of me and my brothers. i was in the middle of them, with collins and joey on either side.

i went to his closet and opened it. i wanted to make sure momma had left some clothes, and sure enough there were some here. i looked through them and saw mostly home dresses and a couple church dresses. they weren't very nice but then something caught my eyes.

it was a gorgeous white dress. it had lace trim and lace short sleeves. i had only seen momma wear this only once in my life, when i was eleven. she had worn in to a picnic, and i can vaguely remember all the men staring at her—momma was a very beautiful woman, even for her age—but she only had eyes for papa. there was quite an age gap between them, but i knew true love when i saw it. the dress looked so lovely, i had to try it on. i took it off the hook and went into my own room.

i took off my clothes and stripped to my undergarments. i slipped the dress over my head and looked at myself in the mirror in my room. it went just above the knee and hugged my body in all the right places. i thought it was so beautiful.

i walked out and into papa's room again. i peeked into his closet once more to see if momma left shoes and thankfully she did. and to my surprise it was matching heels to go along with the dress! i wondered if momma ever wore it when she had visited papa before, or if they went on dates. the personal life of my parents were a mystery to me, as would my love life be to them.