Lost Heart √

Twenty Eight

Skylar's POV

I slept restlessly the whole night, and all my sleep seemed to consist were dreams about Alex. Nightmares made up of all kinds of horrors that my brain could've conjured up with. Blood and deafening gunshots and me losing everything that I've ever loved. Everything.

I woke up with a soft intake of breath, blinking and staring up at the dark ceiling for the first few minutes. It took me a while to come back to it, feel the soft dark duvet over me and the bedsheets below me. Everything was dead silent in the room. Dark and silent until I felt the bed dipping a little beside me. Turning my head around, it took me a moment to notice Caden sitting on his side of the bed, and looking as wide awake as I hadn't been a few seconds ago.

Frowning at his back, I sat up slowly and looked over at the windows. It was still pitch dark outside, I realized, and I didn't know what time it was or how long he'd been awake.

"Hey," I whispered.

I practically felt him stiffening (in alarm? I couldn't quite tell) before his gaze found mine.

"Why aren't you asleep?" He asked me, and maybe it was just the sleep clogging my brain right then, but I could've sworn I saw this...strange sense conflict in his eyes alone. A struggle that had him furrowing his brows.

"Why aren't you asleep?" I directed the question back at him. My eyes darted down to something in his right hand, slightly hidden out of my sight, but not enough for me to not recognize the starting of it. I looked up at him and away from the familiar orange pill bottle in his hand. "Can't sleep?"

He seemed to be avoiding my gaze now.

"Caden." I scooted closer towards him until I could feel his arm pressing against mine. "Tell me."

He stared down at the pill bottle for another half a minute before placing it away on the bedside table. "What should I tell you?" He asked softly.

"Something." I grabbed his hand. "Anything."

He seemed to contemplate. "I still haven't found anything regarding Alex yet."

"That's not what I...You know that's not what I meant."

He turned our hands and laced our fingers together, pulling them closer towards himself. I couldn't help but notice the utterly bedraggled state of his hair, sticking up in almost every direction--as if he'd tossed and turned a hundred times before finally giving up on sleep.

"You couldn't sleep?" I repeated and Caden nodded briefly this time. "Why can't you?"

"Why do you think, Sky?" He breathed out a short, tired laugh. "I just can't sometimes."

A beat of silence passed by and I looked away, down at our hands, hearing the hands of the wall clock ticking by.

"I had a bad dream about Alex," I murmured and it felt like a secret when the words were whispered like this in the night. "He was hanging off a bridge and...and there was blood. I was there, but I wasn't helping. And it strangely looked a lot like the Costa Bridge, now that I think about it."

Caden remained silent, though I felt his grip on my hand tightening just a fraction.

"Is it the dreams," I asked, "that make it harder to sleep?"

He gave me an equally exhausted shrug. "I don't know. Maybe?" I was the one who fell silent this time and perhaps it worked since he added, "It's nothing, Sky. Don't worry about it. It's always been this way."

I frowned and shifted until I was sitting in front of him, facing him directly this time. "What do you mean it's always been this way?"

"I mean--" He placed his hands on my waist, just below the hem of my tank top, and pulled me closer. "--that it's always been like this. As long as I can remember. Why didn't you put on the hoodie I gave you?"