Georgia Nicolson Fanfiction: "An Ode to Pants"

"I would call you a prat, but that would be an offense to prats."

DISCLAIMER: I just wish to say that these characters belong to the amazing author, Louise Rennison, not me, so if you haven't read ALL of the Georgia Nicolson series, I suggest you do and THEN read this. Enjoy ~

PREVIOUSLY
"Go on then, giove us a snog an possibly a rummachen unterhalb der taille. Go on, you know you want to."
And I did want to.

5 Mins Later
"So, Sex Kitty, what do we do now?"
I look at Dave. He looks at me. I don't want to say this out loud, but I can feel myself going ever so slightly cross-eyed. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, I can hear,
"Oh jah, HORN, oh jah, HORN!"
Coming from down the corridor. Sven, in his furry shorts, bursts into the room, with Rosie and the rest of the gang trailing behind him.
"GEORGIA, I HEARD SUSPICIOUS NOISES FROM IN HERE!" Screams Rosie in a mad and clinically insane way. Then she sees Dave.
"Dave? Georgia? What in the name of beezlebub's panties have I missed??"
Dave winks at me and says, "Georgia has come to her senses and wants me to be her girlfriend."
Jas looks at me like I am a looking-thing. Hahadiha. She can no longer ridicule me for my big red bottom. The rest of the gang are being limpets. All clinging around my neck and saying loudly in my ear, "OHH GEE WE ARE SOOO HAPPY FOR YOU!!"
Well, I say the gang, but Ellen is standing in the corner with her arms folded and glaring at me like I have snogged her boyfriend. I would say she was being a prat, but that would be an offense to prats. Crap, she's making me feel bad, let's look at something else. Dave is smiling at me. Like really smiling, like he really, you know, likes me. I smile back at him and he looks at Ellen and flicks his head as if to say "Who pissed in her coffee?" I respond with a shrug.
Jas says, almost mockingly, "What number are you planning to get up to with him, then, Georgia?"
Dave's face lights up with a cheeky grin, "Well, Kittykat? Do you want to go all the way with the Hornmeister?"
I blush and shift around nervously.
Rosie does something sane for once in her life.
"Gang, let's bounce out. Georgia and Dave obviously want to talk about stuff."
I give her the official, "You can have a piece of chuddie in the morning from me," look.
They all slope off and Dave says,
"You okay, Kittykat?"
I nod, not particularly convincingly I guess because Dave says, "You aren't. What's bothering you?"
It feels like someone else is possessing me; suddenly I have tonnes of questions to ask Dave, all of them about snogging. I blurt out the first one on my mind.
"Dave, are you a virgin?"
He looks away from me. Oh God, why couldn't I just have shut up??
After what seems like a million years, he replies, "Yes."
Wow. I wasn't quite expecting that answer. I kind of thought that a callous Hornmeister would have got to number 10 by now. Dave stares at me. "Why you want to know?"
He knows why."You know why, Dave the Laugh."
He laughs in a nice way. "So, Sex Kitty, do you want to go all the way with me?"
I blush. I nod.