Terra Equus #1

Chapter 2: 27 April 99,999 (2nd try)

Although it was not generally allowed for herd members to communicate with pariahs, Silverbreeze was still disapointed that Dreamwalker, who, hence her name, had the rare ability to dreamwalk, did not visit during the night. He was not suprised, though. Even though Lineal Dreamwalker was not one to obey rules, she did not have full control of her dreamwalking yet. Also, he and Dreamwalker never had the best relationship, she had always been too intolerant and insensitive for Silverbreeze. Despite all that had happened, Silverbreeze was in a more optomistic mood than the day before. His dream from last night had also awakened his curiosity about the Cave of Souls. The sun was just emerging over the horizon when Silverbreeze ate a quick meal of grass, still wet with dew, and set off in the direction of east, his internal compass guiding him.

After pausing to stop at a stream to drink a few hours before sunpeak, Silverbreeze

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(do you like the first or second try more? also, any suggestions for how the story should turn out? finally, do you think I should continue writing the story, and if I do, should I continue the first or second try?)