Losing A Loved One(Open For Sharing)

LOST

You know how some times in one moment you feel like you are the happiest person in the world but suddenly in the next you feel like you have lost everything. You are surrounded with so much gloom and dismay. My life is a total mess or a sand put to state clearly . I feel like I am just drowning over and over again . I guess it's what you get , when you stay alive while everybody you care about does around you. I really feel very very bad for myself I guess. I know I am not supposed to indulge in self pity but I just , don't know what else I am supposed to do. I feel really bad. It's like I had life and now. Now, I am just dead. Life shall never put anyone else through such circumstances . I loved him a lot , more than myself. I have a family but I guess nobody can ever understand what I am going through. I really feel like I have lost all the hope lately. Every time I pick myself up and try to construct a life for myself it goes like SMACK , crashed on the floor. He was like my life. He was there for me. And I don't care if some body else is not. I feel lonely all the time. I pray to thy God to, either send him back , or take me to him . Because I can't live like this. My life feels really broken I would really appreciate if anyone would be in love with me as much I was with him . He was mine and I was his. My dearest dad and his dearest daughter. I just feel astonished sometimes how people fail to recognize the severity of the bond between father and daughter. I just seek escape sometimes . I know , I use I alot but I am sure a lot people out there must be feeling the crisis. For me personally , l find splice in talking or in this case writting about how I feel but all of you can find what makes you feel better. Personally, I would say talking about it is the best because once you have talked all of it through your feelings get exhausted. It's like you are trying to burn up your emotional fuel. Once the tank is empty you will feel light just like a vehicle does. We all fear judgement, misuse, or worst just don't feel secure enough to share. But you know what the worst is, not being able to share. It keeps you happy. I makes you feel like you are not lonely. You are not weak if you share , on the contrary you are strong. Stronger than you think, stronger than anyone else thinks you are. Trust me.