I wish I knew how to say goodbye

Struggling to fall asleep

I laid there in bed thinking about what you said, how you said it and why you would have said it. I still can't get over the fact that you have me an ultimatum, either I drop all my friends or we couldn't be a thing anymore. I couldn't bear the thought of not talking to any of my friends anymore but I also don't want to lose you. You get so mad sometimes but don't we all? There are plus sides to you, the way you hold me at night when I feel alone, and the way you can calm me down when I feel upset. But I don't know how much longer I can take this. When you told me about the decision I had to make I asked you how long I had until I gave you an answer and you said I could think on it until the morning, so we said our goodnights and fell asleep. Well at least YOU fell asleep. I just couldn't fall asleep tonight the thought of not talking to my friends made my stomach hurt how could someone expect me to make this decision? Babe are you awake? "Hmmm barely do you need something?" No, but I'm having a hard time falling asleep are you sure I have to drop my friends, they just don't seem that problematic to me? "They are don't question it, you just love them so much you can't see the pain they're causing you" I didn't say anything after he said that I laid in bed until I decided I didn't want to deal with him anymore, I packed my bags and I decided today would be the last day I loved someone who didn't love me back.