Single Mommy « J.JK »

Chapter Fifty Seven

She was hurt. Not on her cheek—which Namjoon had slapped— but on her heart. The pain wasn't for her, it was for him. She could see the tears, regret, and sadness in Namjoon. His cheeks were all red and his nose suddenly turned red.

They walked to a more private room. The kitchen, since there's no living body present in this room than themselves.

"I-am sorry Shang..... It's just-its just because you have him. He was wrapped around your fingers.....and I couldn't do anything. You are an amazing woman, Shang, you are. I understand why he choose such an amazing female to be in his life.....but Shang I couldn't stand it" he began to speak after two or three minutes of silence. Namjoon leaned his tall and limp body on the kitchen counter, feeling his heart beating wildly.

" I don't blame you, Shang..... It's just that Jin Hyung gave up his responsibilities to our empire just for you.....he passed the heritage to Taehyung just for you, just so he could be with you. He sacrificed his power just for fucking you. " She was taken aback by his curse, but she manage her composure.

" I don't blame you......I blame my shitty self. I'm jealous of Taehyung, he has the company. I'm jealous of Jin Hyung because our grandparents gave all our heritage to him, and I'm jealous of you. You have Jin who's head over heels to you. Shang, I made a sinful act towards the Lord our creator our savior" he confessed. walking nervously with hesitating steps in the kitchen room. He would ruffle his hair or pull it away from his head.

"Do you perhaps-"

"Yes, Shang" He let out unsteadily, sweat already forming on his forehead and his pupils shaking. " I know he's my fucking cousin, I know we're related by blood but I couldn't help it also! I'm head over heels for him, I fell for my cousin. It's disgusting. I don't know why. I couldn't control the stupid emotions I have towards him, the attraction that wasn't supposed to exist. " He began to punch his heart harshly.

A sin to which he despite and took a liking also. He tried to stop himself to have the attraction deeper but he couldn't. He ended up falling into the deep dark hole that was Jin's endless charms.

" I didn't know Joon.....if you told this to me I could have helped you... I could have talked to Jin About this.....we could have made it clear" She walked towards Namjoon who suddenly sat down on a stool, with his arms on the kitchen counter. 

"No..... I don't want him to know..... I don't want anyone to know, but you. Even if you have the man that I love, you're still the one I could fully trust in this world. I could trust my life to you....that's how amazing you are Shang." He looked up and met her eyes who were worried about his who were sparkling with tears. Like any other problem, the heavyweight was lifted on his shoulders and heart just by letting his emotions out. By confessing "I told you this because I know you would not tell anyone about this misfortune of our family. It's like the generation of my father and Taehyung's mother suddenly happened....again."

"I-I'm sorry for being blind Joon, I could have done something about this.....I could have prevented hurting you like this" Even if it wasn't her fault, she still manage to apologize to the male who was now crying with his hands covering his eyes. Not wanting to show his weak body to the female who took his someone. He could at least be strong in front of the girl, because she went through more worst than him. He must understand that Shang had undergone a lot of pain during these past few years. He also wasn't aware of the tumor she had.

"But how come you're alive?" Namjoon asked. His eyes sparkled with hope. Hoping that Seokjin was alive.

She was contemplating whether to tell the truth about Jin who took her away and gave her false answers or just tell him a lie about the after mat of the explosion. But she couldn't lie anymore, she felt guilty about what she unknowingly do to Namjoon.