But common sense ain't common, when you come to mind
Common sense told me she was not worthwhile
Common sense said don't go the extra mile
Common sense said go back and reconcile
But common sense forgot about her smile'
𝐈 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔 how many times I had replayed his song on his Instagram. It was posted a short time after we had broken up. He would lick his lips as he sang like an angel, wearing a hoodie and ripped jeans with his usual messy hair. That was my favourite look of his since it was so effortless, and he knew that.
But I couldn't really read his emotions in this minute video, I didn't know if anyone who watched saw the sadness in his eyes, or simply wanted to admire his talent. It was a negative thought, but I wanted to see if he had the same sorrow that I preserved. I didn't reach out when I heard the song, instead I cried alone in a different school halfway across the world from him. And maybe it was common sense to keep it that way.
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𝐉𝐎𝐒𝐇 𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐘 orbit much on set, as per his initial request. He had been spending time with the main cast predominantly and I was shooting for segments at a time, dancing behind them or standing as a classic reactor to the cast's lines. However, after days passed, we were able to have small conversations here and there when I hung out with the group. We talked about Woody the dog; his sisters and we would joke together time to time. I used to be so close to his sisters. And it was seemingly just easier for us to be around each other, like we could be friends again. I wonder what changed.
We still hadn't been truly alone though, however I believed Josh was subconsciously ensuring that. A couple of days ago he did mention about hanging out after filming, but Frankie had asked me to help him rehearse the Born To Be Brave dance number, for which Jules and Dee joined - he hadn't asked since. I think it was up to me to make a moment happen, because I could always sense his confusion around me: Do I act normal? Do I stay mad? Can I laugh with her?
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I was on my way to another dance rehearsal with the group after we finished filming. I didn't want to go if I was being perfectly honest. I was already exhausted from the long day and I felt like I hadn't laughed enough today. It's stupid I know, but it was taking a toll on me.
