Double Bubble Disco Queen

14. 🔪🎭

Sorry

Kellin's pov

I've practically live In Vic's arms now. I wake up in his arms, go to class, get raped or hurt by Josh, then go to Vic's room and get into his arm.

I hardly eat but if I do it's in Vic's arms. It's been a week since I've been to my room. I cant stand to see Oli. Whenever I do see him in my class my heart burns and aches. Josh is always looking at me and Oli in class. I think he's trying to see if we are still fooling around.

Oli's been seeing someone and he's been really weird. He has hickeys and I think.. I think he's on something. In class today he was twitchy and just.. off.

"What's wrong?" Vic asks for the thousandth time this week. I shake my head no and he hugs me from behind as I sit in his lap.

"These bruises aren't nothing," he says pushing up my sleeve. I pull then down and lean back on him.

"I don't care.." I mumble.

"Where is happy sassy kellin? Why are you like this," he says and I pout. Awsten has night classes so he's not here.

"Shit happens.." I mumble and he makes me lay down next to him. He crosses his legs and touches my stomach as I lay on my back. I flinch a little and he pulls up my shirt.

He gasps and looks at my bruised ribs. "Why the fuck did this? You get in a lot of fights but this- this is too much," he says and I shake my head no.

"Tell me!" He yells at me and I flinch and get off the bed. "I'm sorry come back," he says and I leave the room. Tears fall freely and I unlock my room and go in Oli is passed out on his bed. Good, I cant deal with him.

I go to my side and take off my shirt- Vic's shirt, and change into my shirt. I change my pants and sit on my bed but when I look back at Oli I see he's looking at me.

"Austin did that?" He asks and I lay down.

"Fuck off," I mumble facing the wall.

"I know you don't like me but something's happening to you and I can see you're not taking it well," he says and I scoff.

"Look in the mirror, something's wrong with you too," I say and he goes quite.

We lay in silence and I can help but wonder what happened to him. He didn't like me so up friends with benefits break up shouldn't have hurt him.

"If I tell you what's wrong with me will you tell me what happened?" He asks. I turn around and look at him. He looks worried for me..

"Sure.." I mumble wanting to know what's wrong with him.

"Well I'm back with my ex and he's been giving me drugs.. I hate myself for being so weak and falling back into old ways," he shares.

"Oh.. I'm, in a way, back with my ex.. not Austin.. My ex is really abusive and manipulative so.. it just hurts to be with him," I tell him and he frowns.

"Why are you with him?" He asks.

I frown and look at him with sad eyes. "I'm stupid, that's why," I say and his phone starts ringing. He looks at it and then me.

"Sorry," he tells me and answer it. "Hey," he tells the phone and gets up and puts on his shoes. "Yeah, no.. I'm still recovering from the last stuff," he say. Drugs..

He leaves the room sending me an apologetic smile. When he's gone I look through my drawers for something that can help me. Pills? I open the container and only see about ten tylenol. That wont kill me..

I look around for something I know that will work. I see my pink pocket knife. When I open it I frown looking at the white blade. This is pretty sharp.. I've never cut myself before. It seems like it would hurt too much.

I touch the blade and look at it with sad eyes. Will this be as easy as I want? Can I really just kill myself? I look at my bare arm. Carefully I put it to my wrist horizontally.

Then I turn it so it goes vertical. Just push down and drag.. Tears fall onto my arm. I push down shaking and quickly slice my wrist it one movement.

Blood starts gushing out and I panic inside but I stay still. The door opens. "Hey I forgot my- Kellin!" Oli say rushing to me and I drop the knife.

"Y-you- oh my god," he says grabbing a random shirt and putting it to my arm. "Hold it," he says and I do as he says not knowing what else I can do.

He picks me up and starts running out the dorms. "You're okay, you're going to be okay, love" he says and by the way he sounds and how much blood is pouring out of my arm I doubt either of us think I'm going to make it.

"Kellin!?" Vic yells running and now opening a door for Oli and running with us. I'm losing consciousness. I vaguely see that Vic and Oli are now rushing me to a hospital..

I don't want to go to the hospital.. I want to bleed to death. Good thing I'm bleeding so much. I pass out hearing panicked voices...

Oh..

Kellin..?

Thoughts?

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