In Wonderland

Part 7: "I was jealous."

Kuzgun sat back and watched Dila as she rounded up the remaining group of teenagers still in the pub. Most had left already but there were still a few lingerers, and Dila was trying to send them home as politely as possible. She was tired and hoping to end the night soon. Or maybe she was trying to simply escape him.

An hour earlier he'd opened up to her and shared the horrors of his past, confessing his biggest fear. For a moment her walls came down, the softness and compassion within her which he loved so much glistened in her eyes – but then she suddenly walked away, putting not only physical but also emotional distance between them. Her rejection stung. A part of him was hurt, severely pissed off. It's not like it was easy for him to let anyone in, it had taken a lot for him to get to this place and she didn't even seem to care. He'd even stormed out of the pub, determined to go home, but standing in the cold air had provided a brief respite and a different perspective. She was doing to him what he'd done to her time and time again, and he simply had to be patient. It wasn't a new epiphany, it was something he had drilled in his head many a times by Cihan – but it was hard to remember that when he was feeling rejected. So he'd stayed outside for several minutes to calm himself down before returning to the pub. And now he was simply observing her, enjoying her in her element.

After the last of her group finally left the pub, Dila headed to the bartender to take care of the bill. Unsurprisingly, she turned over to glare at him when the bartender informed her the bill was already paid. Kuzgun smiled. She wasn't avoiding him now. As she stormed towards him, he casually leaned back in the booth, resting his arm along the cushion. Her cheeks were red with anger, her blue eyes sparkling more than usual. Goddamn, she was beautiful.

"Why did you pay my bill?" she demanded standing in front of him.

"Because I wanted to."

"You had no right to do that."

He took a sip of his beer. "Why don't you pay me back by taking me out to dinner?"

"Why don't you go to hell?"

He laughed as she strutted away to the bathroom, leaving him to admire her from a distance. The pub was in their neighbourhood, and he recognized few of the people in there, even nodding hello to some when they smiled at him. More and more this new place, this new country was beginning to feel like home but without the ghosts from the past haunting him. While it was true he missed his family occasionally, he also felt more at peace with the distance between them. He'd lived alone for so long, had changed so much but it was as if his family couldn't understand why he was so different than the little boy that had been taken. His mother didn't see him for who he was and instead viewed him as some kind of perfect child, his sister didn't approve of his ways, and Kartal had moved away to make a new life for himself. Cihan was the only one who hadn't weighed him down with expectations and Kuzgun felt the ache of his best friend's loss daily.

Kuzgun was pulled out of his reverie the moment he saw Dila talking to some guy near the pool table. Immediately his temper flared. Her back was to him but it was clear she was flirting with the guy, her soft laughter drifting over to his corner of the room. Kuzgun's jaw clenched, he glared at them. It was obvious she was doing this to piss him off. Fine. If she wanted his attention, she got it.

He stood up and sauntered over to the pool table, sneering at the sight of Dila teaching the guy how to take the perfect shot. "Having fun, sweetheart?" he taunted, leaning against the pool table directly next to Dila.

The guy looked visibly uncomfortable as his gaze shifted between Kuzgun and Dila. "Sorry, didn't realise you were here with someone."

"I'm not," Dila replied.