In Wonderland

Part 12: The Reckoning

Kuzgun entered his bedroom, and felt his stomach lurch at the sight of Dila curled into a ball on his bed. She looked so tiny and fragile. Broken. He wished there was some way he could erase every one of her wounds but knew that was impossible - he was responsible for most of them.

"Dila, you need to eat something," he said quietly, watching her with concern.

She turned on her side, facing away from him.

Ever since their return from the hospital, Dila had been acting strange. At first she'd dissolved into tears, quietly sobbing, but a few hours later she fell into some kind of numb state that he found even more disturbing. At least when she was crying, he could comfort her, offer her solace, but when she was this closed off and distant he had no idea how to reach her. It reminded him of the last time he saw her like this – a few weeks ago, when she'd stopped going into work and just stayed in bed – and how much it scared him. Dila was passion and fire, the kindest, most compassionate person and the strongest. Yet to see her so withdrawn – it was terrifying. Afraid or not, he still needed to do something to help her.

Kuzgun circled around the bed before taking a seat on the floor, sitting at eye-level with her. Their gazes met briefly before hers dropped, and he reached out to hold her hand that was hanging idly over the side of the bed. His fingers gently stroked her hair.

"Dila, Rob will be okay. I promise. He's already complaining about how much I suck at not having proper video games." The last bit was said with affection, and he hoped it would bring a smile to her face like it did his when the kid whined about it.

"Whose idea was it?" Dila finally spoke.

"What?"

Their eyes locked, and he spotted the flash of anger behind the hollowness. "To kill my father in such a horrible way."

His heart stopped. It was bound to happen sooner or later, there was only so long they could avoid the elephant in the room, but even then he hadn't expected that to be today. At this moment. He moved his hand away from her hair, but the other still clung to her arm. "Dila, I-"

"Do you regret it at all?" She sat up, physically pulling away from him to lean back against the headboard. Her eyes drifted away from him, staring into nothingness again. "A silly question. Of course you don't." She threw the blanket aside and shuffled off the other side of the bed.

"Where are you going?" he asked, standing up.

"I need to be alone."

No way in hell was he letting her go. She opened the door but he forcibly pushed it close, whirling her around. The fire had returned to her eyes as she glared back at him with open hostility.

"Let me go, Kuzgun!"

"No! We need to talk about this."

"Why? You want to brag about how you pulled it off?" Her eyes brimmed with tears as she stared down at her splayed hands. "I remember how scared he looked... the horrible pain he was in when I shot him..." She shook her head, his heart twisting at the strange mix of choking laughter that escaped her mouth. "He died knowing his own daughter was the one who killed him." Her angry gaze met his again. "Nothing could have hurt him more. You executed your plan perfectly."

"Do you really think I would've done that to you?" Kuzgun yelled back, hurt.

"Happily." Tears streaked down her cheeks as she grimaced. "Nothing was more important than your revenge."

"Fine. Yes, that's true. I hate your father-"

"Hated," she pointed out, her lips curled into a thin, bitter line. "He's dead, remember?"