People Talk

3. jonah moore is panicking

THREE
jonah moore is panicking

"Axel, take some toast or something with you."

Axel halted in the middle of grabbing his lanyard, glancing at his mom. She was sliding a plate of toast and bacon over to him. Axel softened a little.

His mom could be awful a lot of the time, but he knew that she loved him, in a weird way. She thought she had Axel's best interest in mind, and Axel didn't know how to tell her that he wasn't happy with how she felt about his friends and certain topics. She had her good moments, like right then.

"I'm not very hungry," he admitted. "So — "

"Please. At least some toast," she begged, tapping the plate. Axel sighed, reluctantly picking a slice up. "Thank you. I don't want you going to school on an empty stomach."

"Yeah, I understand. Thanks." He kissed her cheek. "Bye. Love you."

"Love you, too."

Axel left, sliding into his car with a sigh. He didn't understand her sometimes. Dad may have been a shitty person, but at least he was consistent with his shittiness. But his mom, however, was a different story. Axel knew she loved him. Even when she was being strict and overwhelming, he knew she had good intentions.

But it didn't mean it was okay.

He pulled out and into the street, playing one of his playlists on the way to school. Sam Smith played through the speakers, and Axel smiled to himself. He'd always loved their music. It kept him sane when he was figuring out his sexuality. Let him know that not every Christian was as vile as they appeared where he grew up. Let him know that God would love him if he was gay. Or bisexual. Or anything not straight or cis.

But I don't believe in Him, he thought. Not anymore.

It was hard to. He knew not every Christian was a terrible person, but it was hard to trust anyone after how he was raised. He was raised on thinking homosexuality was sinful, and so was lying, sex before marriage, all of that shit. He did it all the time. Hell, not every person followed those rules. People lied every fucking day.

So why are they picking and choosing? It's not fair.

Axel turned off the radio. He hated thinking about that shit. When he was alone or out of the house, he prefered to leave all that fuckery at home. It always put him in a bad mood.

         When he got to school, the stares were instant. He almost sighed out loud. Do they have anything better to do? Are their lives so fucking boring that they have to make drama in someone else's? He ignored them, making his way toward Nasir and Raegan, who didn't look too happy.

        He stopped next to Raegan, frowning at Nasir, who was anxiously checking his phone. "Why does the twink look constipated?"

The boy lifted his head to glare at Axel. "I'm not constipated," Nasir grumbled. "My shitting tendencies are just fine."

"Okay. Why d'you look like you just smelled some nasty ass shit? Like unwashed ass."

Nasir's brows were sewn together in bewilderment. "Do you know what unwashed ass smells like?"

"Unfortunately. Never hook up with a guy who wants to be a wrestler when he's older."

"I... Wasn't planning on it."