The Rebel

Chapter 7

So I know it's literally been a year, and I'm sorry. My wirting is way different than it was when ! started so the first 6 chapters are like shitty as fuck- I'm planning on redoing them at some point, so just stay tuned haha. 

Love you guys

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He threw me down on the dirty floor and I sat there for a minute as the door made a loud clang as he shut it and locked and took off back up the stairs. My mouth filled with the salty taste of blood and I spit it out wiping my mouth with my sleeve. I couldn’t find it in myself to get up, my muscles were trembling from over exhaustion from sitting up too long so I just laid down on the cold concrete floor, closing my eyes and gaining strength.

The last few years had been hell. A few years after my dad died I ended up mating with Tyse. The first few years, I didn’t talk much, all I did was the family business, killing lost its meaning, so it was easy to do. Tyse got me out of everything I had been involved in making me promise to never to put myself in danger like that again.  I felt my nose burn with the want to cry. I had no idea where he was, or what happened to him.

I knew he wasn’t alive, after the worst pain of my life his mark disappeared, not long after that my brother’s pack was attacked. I didn’t know where any of my brothers were. I sat up suddenly and threw up, thinking about them.

I hadn’t cried yet, I wouldn’t not in front of them. I wouldn’t give them the satisfaction. I took in a shaky breath. Somehow they knew about Noah.

At first it was torture, all the pain. Now I was used to it. I didn’t really feel pain anymore, in fact I didn’t feel anything anymore. Pain had lost its shock, pain was just something else I experienced like breathing or standing. I was numb to it.

I had been in this same cell for a few years. I had learned not to get attached, a pain in my stomach hit me hard and I gasped at the memory of Alex. She was a maid, they finally realized after a couple weeks torturing information out of me wasn’t going to work, so they used her.

I clenched my jaw, sitting up.

I missed Noah. After I had found out he hadn’t killed my mom I was needless to say upset. I had hated him for no reason. He may have been a bad person and he may have had a lot of innocent blood on his hands, but so did I. Sitting here with nothing to do but think had given me enough time to make my peace with everything I needed to including him.

His forgiveness was the only thing that gnawed on me. I made a promise to myself that if it was the last thing I did I would get his forgiveness, if I could. I knew making promises such as these were stupid, I knew I would likely die here and disappointing myself wasn’t the way I wanted to out. Neither was weak.

I was weak, I was extremely weak, I could barely stand for more than 5 minutes. But I never let it show, I never cried, or screamed, I never showed any weakness.

I wanted Noah. I wanted him more than life itself. I wanted to be with him. I wanted to be around him. I wanted to hear him talk and be able to smell his intoxicating scent.

I couldn’t remember anything. I couldn’t remember his deep voice, or his scent. I couldn’t recall any of it. I could remember the sensations it gave me. I could barely remember what he looked like. After my dad died I have forbid myself from ever thinking of him.

I banished any memory of him to a deep part of my mind. And when I was with Tyse, Noah never crossed my mind. Tyse was all the things Noah wasn’t.

Over time Noah face had just gotten grainy.

I sighed not bother to look around, there was nothing to look at believe me I knew. I was so tired and exhausted. I just wanted to sleep.