From Vague To Vivid

Chapter 3

Previously

Draupadi was not used to Arjun's confessions. Yes she was aware about his feelings for her, he never made her love for him feel unrequited and that was the only thing that helped her move through every stony path of her life. But he never openly claimed either.

A small smile made its way on her lips as she kept her hand on Arjun's which were cupping her face.

But as soon as she did that Arjun withdrew his hands.

Whatever Arjun said just now was a shock for him too. He immediately stood up now with his back towards her and as soon as he did that he missed the feeling Panchali's skin on his own's, he missed her small smile which was probably gone by now but he knew better than that.

He shouldn't have done this especially after what he did in the Dhyut Sabha. He can't shout and claim his love just after he failed her. No. This is not the Arjun he knew.

He can't ask for her forgiveness by emotionally blackmailing her. He has to... he should prove her that he desrves it.

His guru told him 'Complacency is a fool's weakness, diligence is a warrior's strength.'
How can he not abide by that? How can he defy his guru?

All these years he never was this open about his feelings. He found that as a threat to both of them.

He couldn't let Draupadi become his weakness, the warrior in him didn't allow that to happen.
He couldn't himself become her weakness, the brother in him didn't allow that to happen because he knew that if he were to go a little more close to her, things would have competely changed for the six of them. And it was either the values of his mother or his own conscience, but he always kept and will always keep his brothers above himself.

He will always keep Draupadi above himself.

She has four other husbands and he did not want to make things further difficult for her.
He can't withstand anyone saying anything to her.
He can't withstand any allegations on her.
The love they share was precious for him .. pious for him and he can't let it be termed as something unholy.

He was able to control himself until now. So what suddenly happened? Why did he lose control?

...

Arjun's actions weren't new for her. She knew this confession session won't last for long. She knew Arjun would have withdrawn sooner or later but even then it stung. It hurt to a level she did not expect.

Couldn't they for once converse without him holding back?

His this habit was not conducive to their relationship. She was being strong enough to stand with him, to let him express himself, even when he gave up on her in the most excruciating phase of her life.

Reminiscing his silence in the Dhyut Sabha broke her again.

She was shocked when Yudhisthir staked her. But still she had this unwavering trust in her husbands, she was sure that once her screams will reach their ears they all would stand up against their 'so called obligations'.

But none of that happened. Much to her disappointment or much to her shock, she couldn't figure.

Neither Arjun nor Bheem was able to do anything. She had so much faith in them but all they did was look down.

She was constantly looking into Arjun's eyes demanding him the reason of her staking,
asking him his reason behind being mute,
and then... then pleading him ...but all she got was the look of helplessness. But to her it was cowardice.
Yes they all were nothing but cowards, something she never perceived her five mighty Pandavas to be.

That was the moment when she doubted that if she, even for a second knew these five men who happen to be....to be her husbands, who were regarded as 'the best of men'.

Anger and hurt filled her voice as she stood and spoke in an indignant manner, "I don't believe you. Your actions Arjun... they are paradoxical to what you just tried to say. You Arjun, you have hundreds of things on the top of me in your priority list and I have learnt to accept that. And you know what, you are right you ... you are a hypocrite. But don't try to be pitiful Arjun. Don't."

And with that she went out of the room.

And once again that room became a witness of their unresolved dilemmas and unsatisfactory expressions.

But Arjun could still hear the room echoing the sweet sound of her anklets or was it his mind echoing that music, the same way he would always hear it when he was away for the 12 years penace?
Initially taking that to be just another uncanny experience, Arjun soon realised that matters where heart is involved, the previously seemed uncanny then becomes cherishable.

Arjun was now brooding about what she said. Yes he kept his family above her, his dharma/even his jyestha's dharma above her. Yes she was right, her outburst was right.

He doesn't have any right to claim that he loves her and of course she will not believe him afterall he never showed it.
That's why all the way he kept thinking he didn't deserve her but seeing her reactions on those words confused him.

The Mahanayak is confused, his life seems a chaos to him.
Dhananjay always believed that actions speak louder than words and always abided by that but he failed to show his love, to his only beloved and was... was that the reason, the desperation that made him stoop so low to accept that he loves her the most when he knew she has his brothers to serve too?

Dhananjay was perplexed. His actions and thoughts seemed unknown to himself.

.......

.......

So...
The story's Panchali is more strong than Arjun. And you know that's what I believe happens in real life too. That's what I experienced. Females are much stronger than males, not physically, but surely mentally and emotionally. And that is something one of my male friends said to me. ;)

Anyways once again an emotional chapter. Well since the story is a continuation of a single scene I will not keep you waiting for long for updates. And I am very much excited to present you the remaining chapters.

P.S- Just saw that the story is #2 in Arjuna in three days. I don't even know how this ranking system works. But lets just grab happiness whenever its a chance to.
Thank you so much readers. *A big hug*🤗

Love and smiles

😘