Previously
Arjun did not reply to her and instead paused for a moment before he said,
" I am mad at myself Panchali for the first time. I never... never felt jealousy with my brothers.
I never felt hurt seeing you with them. I never felt that in these 20 years of our life Panchali.
I thought my love was not possessive. I thought I was over these emotions then what ... WHAT made me act like the way I did.
WHY?"Arjun was practically screaming and Panchali knew no one would even believe that the great Mahanayak, the unparalled warrior, the one who was always heedful to his ambitions and goals, has this side also, the vulnerable one.
Arjun collapsed on the floor and continued further looking at the ground, "I never felt anything except love and respect for my brothers but when...when you were dragged, much worse when you were disrobed I felt...HAT...HATRED towards jyestha ? How could I?"
Arjun took his face in his hands. Panchali did not sit next to him. She wanted him to heal and recover on his own the same way she did all these years.
She could see herself in him. His breakdown was similar to what she felt every single time she heard of his marriage alliance. They are so similar yet so different.
But Arjun's condition was not helping and she could no longer see him in that state.
Just when she was about to speak Arjun spoke, "You know what Panchali... yes... if given a second chance I would....yes I would go against Mata's words ,
I would go against jyestha decisions of dividing you,
if ... if given a second chance I would have stormed out of the dice hall the moment you were staked.
I would have held your hands and would have fled out of Hastinapur. Yess....
I would have slaughtered both... both... Duryodhan and Karna then and there itself
..I would have...."Arjun could not speak further as Panchali's index finger came in contact with his lips.
Her lips were quivering but her eyes were smiling. She saw the dauntless determination that his eyes were reflecting when he spoke those words and at that moment she didn't want anything else.
"shhh stop Arjun stop." Panchali cupped his face to calm him but somehow she herself got lost in the depth of his hazel eyes. When she was about to remove her hands Arjun put his hand on hers, ceasing her action.
With their eyes boring into each other, the illusion of time stopped for them, there was no future no past, the only thing known to them at that moment was present, THE NOW, as they both got lost in the sea of their love, willingly or involuntarily, no longer matters.
Their state of trance broke when they heard the loud noise of one of the windows shut because of wind.
Panchali was quick to come to action let Arjun stand up from the ground and lean on the couch and finally she herself slept with her head on his chest, hands on his waist.
But Arjun couldn't relax. He was stiff, still comprehending his sudden outburst. He couldn't help but think that the words that left his mouth were really his.... and if it were then.... then probably all this time he doesn't know the real him.
The tense posture of his body, his restlessness was enough Panchali to realise he was confused now analysing what he said.
"Arjun please... please stop judging yourself... stop controlling your emotions....STOP abiding by the rules of the world and just for once let your tears flow... let your emotions flow without any judgement.
For once like I am not the Pandavas's wife you are not the Mahanayak just Arjun... my Arjun.
Whatever you said just now was all true Arjun.
Stop denying it.
Stop trying to make it a lie....
stop analysing every word you said and accept...accept that for all these 20 years you were...you were not happy about my sharing, you were neither neutral, just the way I was.. I was and still am envious about your wives.
Its just that you never allowed yourself to feel that way and I know you like things to be controlled but you can't every time control what you feel."Panchali glanced at Arjun but he was looking at the ceiling.
"I am not holding any grudges against you. From now on you will never see me complaining about any thing from the past.
I promise.
Let's start our lives again Arjun. This time not concealing but being naked in front of each other.
Being naked about our feelings.
And no I don't want a promise, I don't want a vow from you Arjun because now I am more than sure that my Arjun will do every single thing possible to help me get justice.
You know Arjun our lives, our souls have been entwined even since before I was born. Our love does not need any validation or any security.....If only we just let our love prevail, if only we don't let the worldly rules and regulations come between us, there will be no one... no one who can break our souls apart."Panchali used her hands to wipe the tears from both of their eyes that's when Arjun realised that he was crying. She placed a small kiss on his shoulders before speaking again.
"Arjun, let's start this new journey by sleeping peacefully in each others arms feeling each others heart beats and warmth."
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So this and the coming chapter are my personal favorites. Tell me what you think about it.
And the story is #1 in just five days 😉.
Thank you😃
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From Vague To Vivid
Historical FictionA short story based on Arjuna, a warrior par excellence, and Draupadi, the most modern woman that ever existed in history, of the Great Indian Epic Mahabharata.