The Certainty of Violet and Luke

Chapter 19

Violet

It seems like the last few conversations between Luke and I feel more like therapy sessions. I don't know what's wrong with me, but the less time I spend standing on top of roofs, jumping in raging waters, cutting my wrists, popping pills, getting drunk, the more time I talk. And it's like I don't have any control over my mouth anymore, words spilling out without any thought. So I'm a bit relieved to have some time away from Luke to shop for a costume, hoping I can clear my head and pull myself together before I spook him - or myself.

'So Halloween's the slutty holiday, right?' I ask Seth as we stroll through the nearly empty racks of the closest Halloween store we could find. I pull a face at what's left; clowns, a dinosaur, there's even a sexy giraffe costume - not sure how the hell they consider it sexy but whatever.

Seth nods, searching through the racks with a disgusted look on his face. 'Yeah, that would kind of be the point.' He glances over at Callie, who's looking at the cape section of the store. 'Unless you're Miss Callie over there. Then you go with the traditional but flawlessly beautiful kind of costume.'

Her cheeks flush as if what he's said is extremely embarrassing. 'I go with what I'm comfortable with.'

Seth nods as she moves over to a section that has masks. 'I know you do,' he says.

I wander to the next rack and sift through the limited selection. 'I don't want to be sexy or traditionally, flawlessly beautiful though.'

Seth glances around at the pathetically empty room that's supposed to be a store. 'Then what do you want to be? '

I give a nonchalant shrug. 'Something edgy, gothic, different.'

His eyes scroll over my outfit I'm wearing now, black jeans and a matching shirt, dressed up with my studded boots. 'So basically what you have now.'

'I have an idea,' Callie says in her quiet voice as she walks over to us. She looks me over from head to toe. 'A really good one actually, for what you said, I mean.'

'Really?' I don't mean to sound as doubtful as I do.

She nods then motions at us to follow her as she heads out of the sad store. 'Yep, follow me.'

Callie was right. Her idea was a good one for me and I end up with the perfect costume, if you can even call it that. I definitely can't wear it to dinner tonight, especially when Luke informed me of his father and Trevor's plans to eat out at this fancy five-star restaurant. Yeah, I'm a burger and fries kind of girl, but tell myself to suck it up and go eat some fancy food. I leave my wavy hair down and put on this thin strapped black dress that has flowers on it, probably one of the most girly items I've ever worn. Then I top it off with my leather jacket, boots, red lipstick and kohl eyeliner because I still want to be myself. They make me check my jacket, though, and I get some looks as we're seated at a table, but they're snooty waiters and I'm sure overpaying costumers can go f**k themselves.

'This place is insane,' I whisper to Luke as the waiter drops the cloth napkin onto my lap - what the hell? The table has the cleanest white tablecloth I've ever seen, and the plates and silverware - don't even get me started on those. They are so shiny it's ridiculous.

Luke sweeps my hair to the side and leans in, lowering his voice. 'I know, but I think they wanted to do something nice for us,' he says while his father is telling the waiter something about wanting sparkling water - water should never sparkle. I open the menu while Luke places a kiss on my bare shoulder, momentarily shutting his eyes as if relishing my scent. 'You look beautiful, though.'

'Thanks,' I say, then joke, 'but my uncanny beauty isn't going to help me understand this menu.'

Chuckling under his breath, Luke leans over my shoulder and glances at the menu even though he's got one of his own. I don't mind, though, the scent of him is absolutely amazing, like soap and cologne with just the barest hit of cigarette smoke.