𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 - 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐎 𝐂.

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏𝟔

its a day after my 17 birthday and exactly two months after Mar was hanged.

"how you felling Zara?" Dad says popping his head into my room. i pull the sheets tighter, "i feel sick."

"well I'm going to work, your medicine is on the counter if you need it. there is also chicken soup if you need some."

"thanks dad, please take care of your heart."

the transplant was a success, he's recovering faster than ever. but for me its just a reminder of how much i miss Mariano. A part of him lives in my dad.

Ever since the transplant, he's been acting strange. He hugs me the way Mar does, with one hand rubbing up and down my back and the other around waist. it scares the fuck out of me, but income way he's being a sign of comfort.

"don't worry, ill take care of your boyfriends heart." dad smiles

"thanks."

he turns to leave but parks at the door with his hand on the handle, turning to face me, "i love you Z."

Z.

My dad never called me Z. it was always Zara.

"i love you too." i say swallowing my tears.

dad leaves, and i bury my fadein my hands. letting sobs ruin my body, again.

i miss him a lot.

i slide out of bed and go to the bathroom, looking for the pregnancy test.

i figured there was a possibility, I've missed my period for two months, and I've always had the sudden urge to throw up all over the place.

i was scared to do the test because i wouldn't know what to do next.

i piss on it and hold the stick out, waiting for the magic to happen. I watch as the test revealed a little pink cross, its positive.

i wrap it in toilet paper and stuff it in the trash, "what do i do now Mar?" i sigh.

i hear the trees rustle and crunch around, and a gust of wind blows through the window.

i know he's here.i feel him.

my heart picks up speed, and i feel a sudden pressure on my lower abdomen. i look up in the mirror and i see him. I see Mariano. He's hugging me from behind , his arms wrapped around my waist and his hands are placed on my belly.

i can feel his warmth.

i look around and no one is there. But i can see him in the mirror, with a big smile. i let myself admire his features, the ones i haven't seen in months. the curve of his nose, and the perfect slope of his jaw.

"i miss you." i say biting my lips to hold my tears back.

i miss you too.  his voice rings in my ears, like music.

"i don't know what to do now." i sob

just wait for nature to do its thing, ill be with you all the step of the way, i promise nothing will happen to you. he says slowly fading 

"don't leave me yet."

I've never left you.

"i love you Mar."

i love you Z

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𝓈𝑒𝒸𝑜𝓃𝒹  𝓉𝑜  𝓁𝒶𝓈𝓉  𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇