A Sentimental Journey

I'll Never Love Again (Now That You're Gone)

Tina stood on shaky legs behind a podium, dressed in all black, about to give a eulogy at the funeral of the man she loved. Newt. She still couldn’t believe he was gone. The butterflies in her stomach fluttered and she remembered solemnly that she needed to start her speech before she collapsed into a broken mess of tears and heartbreak and hormones.

“Ahem,” the now-retired Auror started. It was deathly quiet; you could hear some sniffling, but nothing obnoxious yet. “Newt… Newt was…” She laughed wetly, a mangled, broken sound. “Something else. He was an extraordinary man, a stubborn fool who stole my heart by breaking all the rules I had sworn to uphold with his characteristic reckless abandon. There was so much we had yet to learn about each other when we first said goodbye, and now I don’t think I’ll ever be able to learn it all.

“Newt taught me valuable lessons during the time we knew each other.” A lonely tear streaked down her cheek and her voice broke. “He taught me that ‘Worrying means you suffer twice,’ which I always refuted with the logic that worrying saved people from death or injuries. He never gave up on his strange philosophy, and that is one of the many reasons why I love this man.” A breath. “Newt also taught me that ‘There are no strange creatures, only blinkered people,’ which I wholeheartedly agree with. Everyone is strange in their own right, anyway. No sense in singling anyone out.

“Newt gave me so much, and I’m glad that I got the chance to repay him, even if I’m still and will forever be in his debt. He gave me a type of love I didn’t know existed at a time in my life where I needed it the most. He gave me the self-confidence to believe that I was—am—beautiful. He gave me himself, in his most true and honest form. He—” Tina swallowed thickly. “He gave me his passion, his joy, his anger, his dedication, his unique interpretation of the world, and, above all else, he gave me the unborn child I carry.”

Tina paused and took a deep breath, resting a hand on her rounded stomach. “I’ll never forget all the time we spent together.” A sob escaped her lips. “And our child will know how amazing of a father you would be to them. I’ll teach them about all of the fantastical creatures you wrote about, and the world we built to give them a future, and the loving family they have. I’ll tell them every night how much we both love them, and I hope that, wherever you are, Newt, you know that you’re one of the best things that ever happened to me.”

She let out another heart-wrenching sob, forcing herself to continue.

“I’ll never forget you. And I don’t think I’ll ever move on with someone new. I don’t want to feel someone else’s touch; I don’t want to light a fire with another stranger because they’re not you. Newt, you…” She sobs and wipes away her tears. “You were a bright light in the depressing darkness of my life, and I could never regret all the mistakes we made along the road to each other.

“Newt… I love you. And I’ll never stop.”