Ⓒⓗⓐⓟⓣⓔⓡ ①⓪ - ˢʷᵉᵉᵗ ˡⁱᵗᵗˡᵉ ˡⁱᵉˢ

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Author's Note: This chapter will be kind of depressing 😽❤️✨ Also sorry for the long wait

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『Eren's P.O.V.』

I was alone in a cold sea of sorrow, swimming in the darkness. Where was I heading? When was this pointless journey going to end? I didn't actually mind the darkness, as it was calming, making me feel at peace. I wouldn't mind drowning, disappearing into it and being forgotten. But something inside me told me that this was not the end. I could feel something warm, and even though I didn't know where it was coming from, I tried swimming towards it.

I slowly opened my eyes only to discover that the warmth was coming from...Levi?
What was I doing here? How did I end up here? How did Levi approve of me sleeping with my dirty clothes in his bed?

My head was spinning not only from all the questions, but also from all the alcohol I had last night. Stupid me.

I tried getting up, but I could feel my head exploding, making me fall back onto the soft bed. For some reason, this was the best sleep I've ever had.

"Eren?" I heard a voice beside me say. I looked, only to see Levi giving me a worried look. I assumed, since he wasn't very good at showing facial expressions.

"How's your head? I bet it hurts like hell." he said, proceeding to get up.

I just laid in bed and stared at him. "I see you're a bit confused." he said as he moved his hand through his dark hair.

"Well after you drank I don't know how much, you were practically giving everybody a show, dancing. At some point you called for me and then you fainted so I took you with me, since I don't know where you live."

I covered my face in embarrassment and rolled off the bed, falling on the ground.
"Owwww, owww, stupid me."

Levi started laughing, which was something you didn't see everyday. "Shut the fuck up, laughing at a helpless human being." I told him, jokingly.

He kept smirking "Get up, brat. Let's go eat so you can take some medicine."

"Oke, let me just go to the bathroom." I said, getting up.

Levi went downstairs before me, as I went to the bathroom. I closed the door and took care of my basic needs then sat down on the cold floor, my back resting on the door.

I felt useless once again, and the urge to cut was big. The only thing I remembered from last night was me storming out after Levi touched my arm. The chances that he forgot about it were very small. I didn't want to have to deal with the questions later.

✨ᴛʀɪɢɢᴇʀ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ✨

I opened a bathroom cabinet, looking for something sharp enough to cut my skin. To my relief I found a razor blade.

I put it onto my arm, and I could feel the cold metal caressing my skin, leaving a red trail behind. I looked at my arm, not satisfied with the result.

I pressed the razor against my skin again and I cut. I cut for the simple fact that I was alive. For me it didn't hurt as much as much as my inside was hurting and it was calming. I kept on cutting, until a knock on the door startled me. For fucks sake.

"Eren? Are you in there?" said Levi, on the other side of the door.

I quickly got up and started cleaning my mess. "Y-Yes. I'll be down in a minute."

"Ok, me and my mom are waiting for you."

✨ᴇɴᴅ ᴏF ᴛʀɪɢɢᴇʀ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ✨

Once I was done I headed downstairs for breakfast.

"Eren, dear. How are you?" asked Kuchel. I smiled at her "I'm okay. My head still hurts a little tho."

"Okay, I'll leave some medicine here for you to take. I have to get to work now." She put on her shoes and opened the door "See you later, boys!" And with that she left me and Levi alone.

I tried ignoring the stares Levi was giving me, focusing on my food. He finished his food and went to wash his plate.

"So you really don't remember anything from last night?" he asked, while scrubbing the hell out of the plate.

"N-Not quite..." I spoke, while chewing. Levi looked a bit disgusted at me "Tch. Don't talk with your mouth full."

"So you remember how the party was before you got drunk?" his voice was as monotone as ever, but I could tell there was more to it. I knew where the conversation was going, and that was the only thing I wanted to avoid.

"I'd rather not." I said, as I finished my food and proceeded to take some medicine.

Levi sighed "Eren. I just want to know if those were what I thought they were."

I froze. "Y-You got it all wrong. It's not what you think. Mind your business." I said, as I made my way to the door.

I didn't bother looking back, but I knew he was watching me. "I'm leaving. Thanks for the food and medicine." And with that I closed the door and ran.

I didn't know where I was heading. I didn't care anymore. I knew my stupid lie couldn't fool Levi and I'd have to somehow explain.

I ran until I reached a bridge. What was I even doing here? And by here I didn't mean the bridge, I meant life. I felt like the sadness inside of me was dragging me down. My arms and legs became heavier, I couldn't keep my head up anymore. I couldn't see the purpose of my living or what I was even trying to achieve. I gave up.

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Heyo! 😽
I might not update for a while, since I'm busy with school and I kind of ran out of ideas. Thing is, I might be giving up on myself before I give up the book, so ummmm cool. 💪🏻😼

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