Hooked Up

Chapter 5 - Breathe

"Avery!" I hear someone call my name as if I'm underwater. "Avery!" The seat belt is released and hands grab my shoulders, a familiar face appearing in front of me. Nate.

I cry out, my shoulders shaking as he turns me in my seat and pulls me into a hug. "Just breathe, Avery, deep breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth" he coos into my ear, stroking my hair gently as I manage to take deeper breaths. "That's it, good, just keep going. You're okay, you're okay."

Slowly I get my breathing under control, and the tightness in my chess releases. I cry into his shoulder silently. I'm not afraid anymore. Nate's here. He's here and I'm okay. We're okay.

Finally when I'm calm enough, I pull away from him and he kisses my forehead. That's also when I notice another figure standing a little off to the side. Landon. I sniff and dry my face on my sleeve. A tissue paper is thrust in front of me and I take it with shaking fingers, blowing my nose.

"How did you know where I am?" I ask my brother, avoiding Landon's eyes, embarrassed he's witnessing this. "I dropped the phone."

"I got the call and knew something was wrong when I couldn't hear anything in the other end," he says, his face concerned as he looks at me. "You were late and I saw the snow. I figured it might have triggered a new panic attack and so I called Miranda and she said you should've been home already. This is the only place I could think of."

I nod, swallowing a lump in my throat and looking away. I haven't had a panic attack since last winter. I experienced one for the first time a few weeks after the crash when I was put in a car and driven home from the hospital, and another one a week later. I've been purposefully avoiding this part of the road ever since the accident, taking the long way around. I don't know what made me drive here tonight.

"Hey, hey, it's okay" Nate says, rubbing my back. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to drive through here. I just... the snow started falling and I guess I went into autopilot," I explain, getting up with shaky legs. I feel tired all over, everything aching.

"Let's go home" Landon says, offering me a warm smile. "I'll take the Mustang, you take hers," he talks to Nate, who nods.

"Come on," Landon gently steers me around the car to the passenger's side. "Let's get you seated. I'm going to put the seat belt on, is that okay?" I nod, closing my eyes as he leans over me. Click. I concentrate on my breathing, trying not to think about the belt strapping me down. I feel an encouraging squeeze on my right thigh and then the door is closed. Nate sits down on the driver's side, picking up my phone and putting it in his pocket before adjusting the seat.

"Just keep your eyes closed, okay?" I hear my brother say before he starts the engine and pulls off. I nod, squeezing my eyes tightly shut. The drive feels excruciatingly long, but I know in reality it's only about fifteen minutes.

I let out a relieved breath when I feel the car coming to a stop and Nate's seat belt clicking off. He opens mine, too, and I finally open my eyes. We get out of the car in silence, Landon pulling up behind us in the Mustang. He hurries to catch us up on the porch.

"Home sweet home," Nate mumbles as he opens the door.

I'm still feeling shaky and cold, shivering in my sweater. Nate leads me to the living room and sits me down on a couch and wraps a blanket tightly around me. He then starts getting the fireplace going and I just sit there staring at him while he works.