Lovesick (COMPLETED!)

Chapter 2

I turn my head and look at my sleeping beauty, resting peacefully on the baby monitor I still rely on. I wonder at what point me watching her sleep on a monitor is considered creepy. Drew is four years old and she looks so much like Dexter. She is named after her Daddy whose last name was Drew. I never changed my maiden name from Moore to Drew, so her full name is Drew Moore. My in-laws didn't love my name choice, but I wanted us to have the same last name. Lots of women keep their maiden names when they marry, so I never thought it was a big deal.

I quit my job at the car dealership shortly after he died. The devastation had consumed me, they were getting tired of my continued absences, so I left. Now, I work one day a week in my parents' small liquor store as a book-keeper. Drew and I still live in the house that Dexter's parents bought us as a wedding gift. Dexter's family moved out here after Drew was born to be part of her daily life. They have their own house, which is about a 10-minute walk from mine, and conveniently my parents live a short 7 minute walk in the opposite direction. Our house is three bedrooms and very cute. It backs to the lake with a gorgeous view.

We live in a gated community in a small town called Whimsy. Within the gate is a Golf Course, a Country Club and a charming, fun little pier that has a restaurant, shops and an ice cream parlor. The houses either back to the golf course or the lake. Whimsy is about an hour west of Yosemite National Park. Whimsy is as cute as it sounds. It takes about 3 minutes to drive through the main strip of town. There are no chain restaurants, chain stores, or chain shops. Every shop, restaurant or service is owned by a local resident. When you drive in it feels as though you are taking a step back in time. It is pristine and most houses have a white picket fence. The whole town is nestled into a cove, on a gorgeous lake in the mountains of California. The air is fresh, the trees are tall, and I never want to live anywhere else.

Today is Thursday, my one day a week to work at the liquor store, and five years ago today, my beautiful, fun, super loving husband died in the Whimsy lake on an ordinary day in May. It is still a tough pill to swallow, the way he died, our daughter being raised by a single mom, the fact that I'm 31 and a widow. My life kind of sucks, being a widow kind of sucks, being a single mom really sucks. I love Drew with my whole heart, I don't know what I'm doing though. She's a handful, my house is a mess, my hair is always unkempt and I'm constantly digging out clothes from the bottom of my hamper to re-wear.

I used to be so proud of the way I looked before this all happened. Yesterday the shirt I wore to the grocery store smelled like mold and had a ketchup stain on the front of it. My mom is constantly coming over and doing my laundry, delivering new clothes she bought me at the TJ Maxx in Davenridge. Davenridge is the closest city to us. It's a bigger small town. That is where you will find major stores and a mall. That is where we drive to see newly released movies.

Our theater here in Whimsy is old, small, smells a little like mildew and plays old movies. We still go, and funny enough that mildew smell has grown on me. The theater owners just sold to a new couple who plan on renovating. They want to keep the charm and the cushy red velvet love seats, but they would like to get rid of the smell. I told them last time I ran into them the smell is kind of charming. This made them laugh, "Lily, how is the scent of mold charming?" She asked. For some reason it just is.

I get out of bed and walk to the window to look at the sky, I'm old school so I pull the window open and stick my hand out to check the weather. I know I could just grab my phone but this is my morning ritual. There are already people on the lake water skiing. It's going to be warm today, so I lay out a pair of jean shorts, and a pink t-shirt my mom just delivered for me last night from her most recent shopping trip at the TJ Maxx. I climb in the shower, as the water hits I remember all the times Dexter and I showered in here together. Feels like yesterday and so long ago all at the same time. I wash my hair with the shampoo and conditioner my mom put in here last night. I even shave and consider donating it to locks of love it's been so long.